during the absence of d. john on the royal galley that afternoon a courier had arrived at barcelona from the court, bearing various letters from the king, all in d. philip's writing, and one of them, dated the 17th of june, or six days after d. john had left madrid, caused the latter the bitterest and deepest dismay. it is not recorded what the orders of d. philip were which caused such distress to d. john of austria; but judging from the two letters which he wrote then, and from other preceding and following ones, it is certain that following other orders, unknown to us, this letter also brought reproaches, more or less severe, from d. philip to his brother, for having allowed himself to be addressed as highness, and for having accepted the honours due to an infante, which on all sides were given him; forbidding d. john in future to accept these honours, which the king had not granted him, and saying that a letter from antonio pérez was coming with a copy of the instructions which had been sent to the ministers in italy, respecting the way in which d. john was to be received and addressed, and he was to keep strictly to these same instructions.
d. john was thunderstruck at this letter, and it amazed the faithful secretary juan de soto, the only person to whom d. john dared to confide it. up to a certain point the fact was true, because it is certain that nobles and people, great and small, regarded and respected d. john, both in spain and out of it, as an infante of castille, as he was a son of the great emperor and brother to the present king, and because his personal gifts and deeds made him worthy of the high dignity. but that which was the spontaneous act of nations and peoples had been transformed by those envious of d. john into intrigues and presumptuous efforts to occupy a rank he did not possess, and this had been treacherously whispered in the monarch's ear. it seems certain that d. john's enemies had carried their tittle-tattle and misrepresentations to philip ii himself; it was also certain that he believed them, and equally certain—and this is what so pained d. john's loyal heart—that d. philip had hidden his displeasure as king and brother, and had said good-bye to him with false words of kindness and confidence, condemning him unheard, in his absence, and deputing a minister to sanction, by a letter, the grave humiliation which he was imposing.
d. john's youthful blood boiled at these thoughts, and, depressed and dismayed under the weight of his first disillusion, he seriously thought of renouncing his dreams of glory, and of taking refuge in the ecclesiastical state, as the emperor, his father, had counselled, as being quieter and more peaceful. juan de soto comforted him with much wise reasoning, and for his counsel and encouragement wrote to the prince de évoli, to whom soto owed his appointment as secretary, the following letter, asking for advice and explanations, which clearly shows the trouble and fears which perturbed him:
"lord ruy gómez, as you well know of h.m.'s new wishes for me since i came here, i will not weary you by mentioning them; but availing myself of your knowledge, and the permission you gave me to go to you as to a father about my concerns, i will say that i have resented and do feel it, as i cannot help doing; not so much, my lord, is my vanity wounded—as i take god to witness that i am free from that—but it gives me much pain that i, alone in the world, have deserved such fresh orders, as i lived in the utmost confidence that h.m. would show to all that he held to me, and that he would be pleased by my being more honoured. i confess that the disfavour of putting me on the common level has wounded me so much that at times i feel inclined to find some other way of serving god and h.m., as in the one i am following i am so clearly shown that i do not succeed; however, if anything deters me, it is that, as i do not deserve it, it is not h.m.'s wish, but that of someone who has more influence with him than i have. consequently, then, lord ruy gómez, if one could see through people, perhaps those who enjoy the public confidence would have most need of advisers and of reform, and this truth i feel the more as the present and future punishment is bitter, not through the fault of those less opinionated, who have less say in the matter, but by means of those who through being so much in favour, and this is certainly seen, show themselves finding fault in every way. all this moves me to speak and hear others more than to be silent, believing that i am pursued by false stories; at all events, i have great cause to complain, when you come to think of the little value that has been placed on all that i have done, to find myself, which is what i feel most, now ordered by h.m. to be placed on a level with those whom god, having made me his brother, did not place between him and me. i well know that my services do not deserve crowns of laurel; but that what i desired to arrive at, and for which i worked, should be so little esteemed, and that instead of being appreciated it should be thought less of by h.m. is what weighs on my mind. i put my trust again in you, whom i implore without keeping anything back to write and tell me what are the causes of h.m. treating me thus, because if you will only let me know that i do not deserve his favours, i would rather serve him in some other way than weary him in my present one. on which matters, if it appears well to you, i would like you to talk to him and give me your advice, reminding him how much he will be worthy of god's pleasure in acting as a father to one who has no other, but a thousand people who will take advantage of my youth and want of experience to compass my ruin, as if that were an honour and glory to them. and as far as this concerns me i again commend myself and it to your notice, to you whom alone i entirely trust.
"our lord, etc. from barcelona, july 8, 1571."
cardinal de granvelle
from his portrait by gaetano in musées municipaux, besan?on
but not satisfied with this, and thinking that it was disloyal not to tell the king what he was feeling, he wrote this other letter on the 12th of july, humble and submissive, as a vassal of the king, but dignified, loyal and energetic, as was always his heart and conduct.
"sir! for the grace and favour y.m. has done me by writing with your own hand, from the bottom of my heart i kiss your hands. i have also received the instructions and other dispatches for my journey, and they have arrived in such good time that it annoys me how much is being lost here, and consequently so much for y.m.'s service; every day i expect the marqués de santa cruz, on whose arrival we can set out, as everything is ready. as to following the instructions and opinions of those whom y.m. has designated to help and counsel me, particularly the knight commander, i will certainly do so, as i know it is my duty, and this being so, it will be my pleasure to care for y.m.'s affairs, with as much sincerity and prudence as the one i am at present entrusted with. in truth, i have no other desire, and it is my duty to arrive at this object, postponing the things of less importance, and y.m. must not doubt that i will continue to act thus, and i beg you to tell me always what i do not understand, for, as i have written before, i trust so little to my youth, experience and judgment, that i well see the want i have of another's help; for which reason i again beg y.m., with all humility, that you will continue to warn and reprimand me as you think well (after having heard) of what i have left undone, because it will not be want of devotion which will prevent me doing my duty. the instructions y.m. gave me on my first setting out on a galley, i look on as very precious, and they will be the more so now that i realise that it gave y.m. pleasure, and nothing i hold dearer than fulfilling your desires.
"i answered the pope as the knight commander thought it was best not to wait for y.m.'s reply; and that it was well to let him know how the matter stood: however, in future i will keep such things secret.
"you have done me a great favour in ordering antonio pérez to let me know what he is writing to the ministers in italy, about the way i am to be addressed, and not only shall i be very pleased to conform to the wishes of y.m. in this, but also it will be my delight to guess your desires, in order that i may follow them as i ought to do; only i make bold to say, with all the humility and respect due, that it would be a boundless favour and grace if y.m. would be pleased to communicate directly with me about what you desire, for two reasons; the chief one being that it is now your pleasure that any of your ministers should confer with me as to your wishes, as none of them are under as great an obligation to do them as i am; the other reason is that before leaving i ought to have given some notice that what y.m. wished should have been done and with less fuss; and inasmuch as god has made me y.m.'s brother, i cannot help saying, or continuing to feel, that personally i am worth little, but when everyone thought that i deserved more from y.m., and expected to see it, by y.m.'s orders i see exactly the opposite, putting me on the common level, which i do not deserve, because i have put the service of y.m. before vanity and everything else, of which god is my witness, and it has given me so much pain to see how little you are satisfied with me, that often i think that if it is y.m.'s pleasure i will seek some other way of serving you, as in the present one i seem so unfortunate in obtaining what i yearn for. meanwhile i will obey y.m.'s orders as far as possible, although it will be difficult amid the adulation i am told exists in italy. y.m. will believe me that i desire neither honour nor good except that with it one can serve the better, but the consideration of this detail does not affect me, only to execute your orders, which for no reason will i fail to do.
"our lord, etc. from barcelona, july 12, 1571."
this was the first sign that philip ii gave his brother d. john of austria of the unjust want of confidence which the ingenious antonio pérez knew how to sow in his path, to whom belongs the doubtful honour of being the only man who for long years could deceive and often pervert the straight and calm judgment of the prudent monarch.