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Marion Fay

CHAPTER XIV. CROCKER'S DISTRESS.
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when midsummer came paradise row was alive with various interests. there was no one there who did not know something of the sad story of marion fay and her love. it was impossible that such a one as lord hampstead should make repeated visits to the street without notice. when marion returned home from pegwell bay, even the potboy at the duchess of edinburgh knew why she had come, and clara demijohn professed to be able to tell all that passed at the interview next day. and there was the great "duca" matter;—so that paradise row generally conceived itself to be concerned on all questions of nobility, both foreign and british. there were the ducaites and the anti-ducaites. the demijohn faction generally, as being under the influence of crocker, were of opinion that george roden being a duke could not rid himself of his ducal nature, and they were loud in their expression of the propriety of calling the duke duke whether he wished it or no. but mrs. grimley at the duchess was warm on the other side. george roden, according to her lights, being a clerk in the post office, must certainly be a briton, and being a briton, and therefore free, was entitled to call himself whatever he pleased. she was generally presumed to enunciate a properly constitutional theory in the matter, and, as she was a leading personage in the neighbourhood, the duca was for the most part called by his old name; but there were contests, and on one occasion blows had been struck. all this helped to keep life alive in the row.

but there had arisen another source of intense interest. samuel crocker was now regularly engaged to marry miss demijohn. there had been many difficulties before this could be arranged. crocker not unnaturally wished that a portion of the enormous wealth which rumour attributed to mrs. demijohn should be made over to the bride on her marriage. but the discussions which had taken place between him and the old lady on the matter had been stormy and unsuccessful. "it's a sort of thing that one doesn't understand at all, you know," crocker had said to mrs. grimley, giving the landlady to understand that he was not going to part with his own possession of himself without adequate consideration. mrs. grimley had comforted the young man by reminding him that the old lady was much given to hot brandy and water, and that she could not "take her money with her where she was going." crocker had at last contented himself with an assurance that there should be a breakfast and a trousseau which was to cost £100. with the promise of this and the hope of what brandy-and-water might do for him, he had given in, and the match was made. had there been no more than this in the matter the row would not have been much stirred by it. the row was so full of earls, marquises, and dukes that crocker's love would have awakened no more than a passing attention, but for a concomitant incident which was touching in its nature, and interesting in its development. daniel tribbledale, junior clerk at pogson and littlebird's, had fought a battle with his passion for clara demijohn like a man; but, manly though the battle had been, love had prevailed over him. he had at last found it impossible to give up the girl of his heart, and he had declared his intention of "punching crocker's head" should he ever find him in the neighbourhood of the row. with the object of doing this he frequented the row constantly from ten in the evening till two in the morning, and spent a great deal more money than he ought to have done at the duchess. he would occasionally knock at no. 10, and boldly ask to be allowed to see miss clara. on one or two of these occasions he had seen her, and tears had flown in great quantities. he had thrown himself at her feet, and she had assured him that it was in vain. he had fallen back at pogson and littlebird's to £120 a year, and there was no prospect of an increase. moreover the betrothment with crocker was complete. clara had begged him to leave the vicinity of holloway. nothing, he had sworn, should divorce him from paradise row. should that breakfast ever be given; should these hated nuptials ever take place; he would be heard of. it was in vain that clara had threatened to die on the threshold of the church if anything rash were done. he was determined, and clara, no doubt, was interested in the persistency of his affection. it was, however, specially worthy of remark that crocker and tribbledale never did meet in paradise row.

monday, 13th of july, was the day fixed for the marriage, and lodgings for the happy pair had been taken at islington. it had been hoped that room might have been made for them at no. 10; but the old lady, fearing the interference of a new inmate, had preferred the horrors of solitude to the combined presence of her niece and her niece's husband. she had, however, given a clock and a small harmonium to grace the furnished sitting-room;—so that things might be said to stand on a sound and pleasant footing. gradually, however, it came to be thought both by the old and the young lady, that crocker was becoming too eager on that great question of the duca. when he declared that no earthly consideration should induce him to call his friend by any name short of that noble title which he was entitled to use, he was asked a question or two as to his practice at the office. for it had come round to paradise row that crocker was giving offence at the office by his persistency. "when i speak of him i always call him the 'duca,'" said crocker, gallantly, "and when i meet him i always address him as duca. no doubt it may for a while create a little coolness, but he will recognize at last the truth of the spirit which actuates me. he is 'the duca.'"

"if you go on doing what they tell you not to do," said the old woman, "they'll dismiss you." crocker had simply smiled ineffably. not ?olus himself would dismiss him for a loyal adherence to the constitutional usages of european courts.

crocker was in truth making himself thoroughly disagreeable at the post office. sir boreas had had his own view as to roden's title, and had been anxious to assist lord persiflage in forcing the clerk to accept his nobility. but when he had found that roden was determined, he had given way. no order had been given on the subject. it was a matter which hardly admitted of an order. but it was understood that as mr. roden wished to be mr. roden, he was to be mr. roden. it was declared that good taste required that he should be addressed as he chose to be addressed. when, therefore, crocker persisted it was felt that crocker was a bore. when crocker declared to roden personally that his conscience would not allow him to encounter a man whom he believed to be a nobleman without calling him by his title, the office generally felt that crocker was an ass. ?olus was known to have expressed himself as very angry, and was said to have declared that the man must be dismissed sooner or later. this had been reported to crocker. "sir boreas can't dismiss me for calling a nobleman by his right name," crocker had replied indignantly. the clerks had acknowledged among themselves that this might be true, but had remarked that there were different ways of hanging a dog. if ?olus was desirous of hanging crocker, crocker would certainly find him the rope before long. there was a little bet made between bobbin and geraghty that the office would know crocker no longer before the end of the year.

alas, alas;—just before the time fixed for the poor fellow's marriage, during the first week of july, there came to our ?olus not only an opportunity for dismissing poor crocker, but an occasion on which, by the consent of all, it was admitted to be impossible that he should not do so, and the knowledge of the sin committed came upon sir boreas at a moment of great exasperation caused by another source. "sir boreas," crocker had said, coming into the great man's room, "i hope you will do me the honour of being present at my wedding breakfast." the suggestion was an unpardonable impertinence. "i am asking no one else in the department except the duca," said crocker. with what special flea in his ear crocker was made to leave the room instantly cannot be reported; but the reader may be quite sure that neither did ?olus nor the duca accept the invitation. it was on that very afternoon that mr. jerningham, with the assistance of one of the messengers, discovered that crocker had—actually torn up a bundle of official papers!

among many official sins of which crocker was often guilty was that of "delaying papers." letters had to be written, or more probably copies made, and crocker would postpone the required work from day to day. papers would get themselves locked up, and sometimes it would not be practicable to trace them. there were those in the department who said that crocker was not always trustworthy in his statements, and there had come up lately a case in which the unhappy one was supposed to have hidden a bundle of papers of which he denied having ever had the custody. then arose a tumult of anger among those who would be supposed to have had the papers if crocker did not have them, and a violent search was instituted. then it was discovered that he had absolutely—destroyed the official documents! they referred to the reiterated complaints of a fidgety old gentleman who for years past had been accusing the department of every imaginable iniquity. according to this irritable old gentleman, a diabolical ingenuity had been exercised in preventing him from receiving a single letter through a long series of years.

this was a new crime. wicked things were often done, but anything so wicked as this had never before been perpetrated in the department. the minds of the senior clerks were terribly moved, and the young men were agitated by a delicious awe. crocker was felt to be abominable; but heroic also,—and original. it might be that a new opening for great things had been invented.

the fidgety old gentleman had never a leg to stand upon,—not a stump; but now it was almost impossible that he should not be made to know that all his letters of complaint had been made away with! of course crocker must be dismissed. he was at once suspended, and called upon for his written explanation. "and i am to be married next week!" he said weeping to mr. jerningham. ?olus had refused to see him, and mr. jerningham, when thus appealed to, only shook his head. what could a mr. jerningham say to a man who had torn up official papers on the eve of his marriage? had he laid violent hands on his bride, but preserved the papers, his condition, to mr. jerningham's thinking, would have been more wholesome.

it was never known who first carried the tidings to paradise row. there were those who said that tribbledale was acquainted with a friend of bobbin, and that he made it all known to clara in an anonymous letter. there were others who traced a friendship between the potboy at the duchess and a son of one of the messengers. it was at any rate known at no. 10. crocker was summoned to an interview with the old woman; and the match was then and there declared to be broken off. "what are your intentions, sir, as to supporting that young woman?" mrs. demijohn demanded with all the severity of which she was capable. crocker was so broken-hearted that he had not a word to say for himself. he did not dare to suggest that perhaps he might not be dismissed. he admitted the destruction of the papers. "i never cared for him again when i saw him so knocked out of time by an old woman," said clara afterwards.

"what am i to do about the lodgings?" asked crocker weeping.

"tear 'em up," said mrs. demijohn. "tear 'em up. only send back the clock and the harmonium."

crocker in his despair looked about everywhere for assistance. it might be that ?olus would be softer-hearted than clara demijohn. he wrote to lord persiflage, giving him a very full account of the affair. the papers, he said, had in fact been actually torn by accident. he was afraid of "the duca," or he would have applied to him. "the duca," no doubt had been his most intimate friend,—so he still declared,—but in such an emergency he did not know how to address "the duca." but he bethought himself of lord hampstead, of that hunting acquaintance, with whom his intercourse had been so pleasant and so genial, and he made a journey down hendon. lord hampstead at this time was living there all alone. marion fay had been taken back to pegwell bay, and her lover was at the old house holding intercourse almost with no one. his heart just now was very heavy with him. he had begun to believe that marion would in truth never become his wife. he had begun to think that she would really die, and that he would never have had the sad satisfaction of calling her his own. all lightness and brightness had gone from him, all the joy which he used to take in argument, all the eagerness of his character,—unless the hungry craving of unsatisfied love could still be called an eagerness.

he was in this condition when crocker was brought out to him in the garden where he was walking. "mr. crocker," he said, standing still in the pathway and looking into the man's face.

"yes, my lord; it's me. i am crocker. you remember me, my lord, down in cumberland?"

"i remember you,—at castle hautboy."

"and out hunting, my lord,—when we had that pleasant ride home from airey force."

"what can i do for you now?"

"i always do think, my lord, that there is nothing like sport to cement affection. i don't know how you feel about it, my lord."

"if there is anything to be said—perhaps you will say it."

"and there's another bond, my lord. we have both been looking for the partners of our joys in paradise row."

"if you have anything to say, say it."

"and as for your friend, my lord, the,—the—. you know whom i mean. if i have given any offence it has only been because i've thought that as the title was certainly theirs, a young lady who shall be nameless ought to have the advantage of it. i've only done it because of my consideration for the family."

"what have you come here for, mr. crocker? i am not just now disposed to converse,—on, i may say, any subject. if there be anything—"

"indeed, there is. oh, my lord, they are going to dismiss me! for the sake of paradise row, my lord, pray, pray, interfere on my behalf." then he told the whole story about the papers, merely explaining that they had been torn in accident. "sir boreas is angry with me because i have thought it right to call—you know whom—by his title, and now i am to be dismissed just when i was about to take that beautiful and accomplished young lady to the hymeneal altar. only think if you and miss fay was to be divided in the same way!"

with much lengthened explanation, which was, however, altogether ineffectual, lord hampstead had to make his visitor understand that there was no ground on which he could even justify a request. "but a letter! you could write a letter. a letter from your lordship would do so much." lord hampstead shook his head. "if you were just to say that you had known me intimately down in cumberland! of course i am not taking upon myself to say it was so,—but to save a poor fellow on the eve of his marriage!"

"i will write a letter," said lord hampstead, thinking of it, turning over in his mind his own idea of what marriage would be to him. "i cannot say that we have been intimate friends, because it would not be true."

"no;—no; no! of course not that."

"but i will write a letter to sir boreas. i cannot conceive that it should have any effect. it ought to have none."

"it will, my lord."

"i will write, and will say that your father is connected with my uncle, and that your condition in regard to your marriage may perhaps be accepted as a ground for clemency. good day to you." not very quickly, but with profuse thanks and the shedding of some tears, poor crocker took his leave. he had not been long gone before the following letter was written;—

sir,

though i have not the honour of any acquaintance with you, i take the liberty of writing to you as to the condition of one of the clerks in your office. i am perfectly aware that should i receive a reprimand from your hands, i shall have deserved it by my unjustifiable interference.

mr. crocker represents to me that he is to be dismissed because of some act of which you as his superior officer highly disapprove. he asks me to appeal to you on his behalf because we have been acquainted with each other. his father is agent to my uncle lord persiflage, and we have met at my uncle's house. i do not dare to put this forward as a plea for mercy. but i understand that mr. crocker is about to be married almost immediately, and, perhaps, you will feel with me that a period in a man's life which should beyond all others be one of satisfaction, of joy, and of perfect contentment, may be regarded with a feeling of mercy which would be prejudicial if used more generally.

your faithful servant,

hampstead.

when he wrote those words as to the period of joy and satisfaction his own heart was sore, sore, sore almost to breaking. there could never be such joy, never be such satisfaction for him.

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