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Mrs. Craddock克拉多克夫人

Chapter XXI
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bertha went home, fuming, knowing perfectly well that edward had really given the orders which she had countermanded, but glad of the chance to have a final settlement of rights. she did not see him for several hours.

“i say, bertha,” he said, when he came in, “why on earth did you stop those men cutting down the beeches on carter’s field? you’ve lost a whole half-day’s work. i wanted to set them on something else to-morrow, now i shall have to leave it over till thursday.”

“i stopped them because i refuse to have the beeches cut down. they’re the only ones in the place. i’m very much annoyed that even one should have gone without my knowing about it. you should have asked me before you did such a thing.”

“my good girl, i can’t come and ask you each time i want a thing done.”

“is the land mine or yours?”

“it’s yours,” answered edward, laughing, “but i know better than you what ought to be done, and it’s silly of you to interfere.”

bertha flushed. “in future, i wish to be consulted.”

“you’ve told me fifty thousand times to do always as i think fit.”

“well, i’ve changed my mind.”

“it’s too late now,” he laughed. “you made me take the reins in my own hands and i’m going to keep them.”

bertha in her anger hardly restrained herself from telling him she could send him away like a hired servant.

“i want you to understand, edward, that i’m not going to have those trees cut down. you must tell the men you made a mistake.”

“i shall tell them nothing of the sort. i’m not going to cut them all down—only three. we don’t want them there—for one thing the shade damages the crops, and otherwise carter’s is one of our best fields. and then i want the wood.”

“i care nothing about the crops, and if you want wood you can buy it. those trees were planted nearly a hundred years ago, and i would sooner die than cut them down.”

“the man who planted beeches in a hedgerow was about the silliest jackass i’ve ever heard of. any tree’s bad enough, but a beech of all things—why, it’s drip, drip, drip, all the time, and not a thing will grow under them. that’s the sort of thing that has been done all over the estate for years. it’ll take me a lifetime to repair the blunders of your—of the former owners.”

it is one of the curiosities of sentiment that its most abject slave rarely permits it to interfere with his temporal concerns; it appears as unusual for a man to sentimentalise in his own walk of life as for him to pick his own pocket. edward, having passed all his days in contact with the earth, might have been expected to cherish a certain love of nature. the pathos of transpontine melodrama made him cough, and blow his nose; and in literature he affected the titled and consumptive heroine, and the soft-hearted, burly hero. but when it came to business, it was another matter—the sort of sentiment which asks a farmer to spare a sylvan glade for æsthetic reasons is absurd. edward would have willingly allowed advertisement-mongers to put up boards on the most beautiful part of the estate, if thereby he could surreptitiously increase the profits of his farm.

“whatever you may think of my people,” said bertha, “you will kindly pay attention to me. the land is mine, and i refuse to let you spoil it.”

“it isn’t spoiling it. it’s the proper thing to do. you’ll soon get used to not seeing the wretched trees—and i tell you i’m only going to take three down. i’ve given orders to cut the others to-morrow.”

“d’you mean to say you’re going to ignore me absolutely?”

“i’m going to do what’s right; and if you don’t approve of it, i’m very sorry, but i shall do it all the same.”

“i shall give the men orders to do nothing of the kind.”

edward laughed. “then you’ll make an ass of yourself. you try giving them orders contrary to mine, and see what they do.”

bertha gave a cry. in her fury she looked round for something to throw; she would have liked to hit him; but he stood there, calm and self-possessed, quite amused.

“i think you must be mad,” she said. “you do all you can to destroy my love for you.”

she was in too great a passion for words. this was the measure of his affection; he must, indeed, utterly despise her; and this was the only result of the love she had humbly laid at his feet. she asked herself what she could do; she could do nothing—but submit. she knew as well as he that her orders would be disobeyed if they did not agree with his; and that he would keep his word she did not for a moment doubt. to do so was his pride. she did not speak for the rest of the day, but next morning when he was going out, asked what was his intention with regard to the trees.

“oh, i thought you’d forgotten all about them,” he replied. “i mean to do as i said.”

“if you have the trees cut down, i shall leave you; i shall go to aunt polly’s.”

“and tell her that you wanted the moon, and i was so unkind as not to give it you?” he replied, smiling. “she’ll laugh at you.”

“you will find me as careful to keep my word as you.”

before luncheon she went out and walked to carter’s field. the men were still at work, but a second tree had gone, the third would doubtless fall in the afternoon. the men glanced at bertha, and she thought they laughed; she stood looking at them for some while so that she might thoroughly digest the humiliation. then she went home, and wrote to her aunt the following veracious letter:—

my dear aunt polly,—i have been so seedy these last few weeks that edward, poor dear, has been quite alarmed; and has been bothering me to come up to town to see a specialist. he’s as urgent as if he wanted to get me out of the way, and i’m already half-jealous of my new parlour-maid, who has pink cheeks and golden hair—which is just the type that edward really admires. i also think that dr. ramsay hasn’t the ghost of an idea what is the matter with me, and not being particularly desirous to depart this life just yet, i think it will be discreet to see somebody who will at least change my medicine. i have taken gallons of iron and quinine, and i’m frightfully afraid that my teeth will go black. my own opinion, coinciding so exactly with edward’s (that horrid mrs. ryle calls us the humming-birds, meaning the turtledoves, her knowledge of natural history arouses dear edward’s contempt); i have gracefully acceded to his desire, and if you can put me up, will come at your earliest convenience.—yours affectionately, b. c.

p.s.—i shall take the opportunity of getting clothes (i am positively in rags), so you will have to keep me some little time.

edward came in shortly afterwards, looking very much pleased. he glanced slily at bertha, thinking himself so clever that he could scarcely help laughing: it was his habit to be most particular in his behaviour, or he would undoubtedly have put his tongue in his cheek.

“with women, my dear sir, you must be firm. when you’re putting them to a fence, close your legs and don’t check them; but mind you keep ’em under control or they’ll lose their little heads. a man should always let a woman see that he’s got her well in hand.”

bertha was silent, able to eat nothing for luncheon; she sat opposite her husband, wondering how he could gorge so disgracefully when she was angry and miserable. but in the afternoon her appetite returned, and, going to the kitchen, she ate so many sandwiches that at dinner she could again touch nothing. she hoped edward would notice that she refused all food, and be properly alarmed and sorry. but he demolished enough for two, and never saw that his wife fasted.

at night bertha went to bed and bolted herself in the room. presently edward came up and tried the door. finding it closed, he knocked and cried to her to open. she did not answer. he knocked again more loudly and shook the handle.

“i want to have my room to myself,” she cried out; “i’m ill. please don’t try to come in.”

“what? where am i to sleep?”

“oh, you can sleep in one of the spare rooms.”

“nonsense!” he cried; and without further ado put his shoulder to the door: he was a strong man; one heave and the old hinges cracked. he entered, laughing.

“if you wanted to keep me out, you ought to have barricaded yourself up with the furniture.”

bertha was disinclined to treat the matter lightly. “if you come in,” she said, “i shall go out.”

“oh no, you won’t!” he said, dragging a big chest of drawers in front of the door.

bertha got up and put on a yellow silk dressing-gown, which was really most becoming.

“i’ll spend the night on the sofa then,” she said. “i don’t want to quarrel with you any more or to make a scene. i have written to aunt polly, and the day after to-morrow i shall go to london.”

“i was going to suggest that a change of air would do you good. i think your nerves are a bit groggy.”

“it’s very good of you to take an interest in my nerves,” she replied, with a scornful glance, settling herself on the sofa.

“are you really going to sleep there?” he said, getting into bed.

“it looks like it.”

“you’ll find it awfully cold. but i dare say you’ll think better of it in an hour. i’m going to turn the light out. good-night!”

bertha did not answer, and in a few minutes she was angrily listening to his snores. could he really be asleep? it was infamous that he slept so calmly.

“edward,” she called.

there was no answer, but she could not bring herself to believe that he was sleeping. she could never even close her eyes. he must be pretending—to annoy her. she wanted to touch him, but feared that he would burst out laughing. she felt indeed horribly cold, and piled rugs and dresses over her. it required great fortitude not to sneak back to bed. she was unhappy and thirsty. nothing is so disagreeable as the water in toilet-bottles, with the glass tasting of tooth-wash; but she gulped some down, though it almost made her sick, and then walked about the room, turning over her manifold wrongs. edward slept on insufferably. she made a noise to wake him, but he did not stir; she knocked down a table with a clatter sufficient to disturb the dead, but her husband was insensible. then she looked at the bed, wondering whether she dared lie down for an hour, and trust to waking before him. she was so cold that she determined to risk it, feeling certain that she would not sleep long; she walked to the bed.

“coming to bed after all?” said edward, in a sleepy voice.

she stopped, and her heart rose to her mouth. “i was coming for my pillow,” she replied indignantly, thanking her stars that he had not spoken a minute later.

she returned to the sofa, and eventually making herself very comfortable, fell asleep. in this blissful condition she continued till the morning, and when she awoke edward was drawing up the blinds.

“slept well?” he asked.

“i haven’t slept a wink.”

“oh, what a crammer. i’ve been looking at you for the last hour!”

“i’ve had my eyes closed for about ten minutes, if that’s what you mean.”

bertha was quite justly annoyed that her husband should have caught her napping soundly—it robbed her proceeding of half its effect. moreover, edward was as fresh as a bird, while she felt old and haggard, and hardly dared look at herself in the glass.

in the middle of the morning came a telegram from miss ley, telling bertha to come whenever she liked—hoping edward would come too! bertha left it in a conspicuous place so that he could not fail to see it.

“so you’re really going?” he said.

“i told you i was as able to keep my word as you.”

“well, i think it’ll do you no end of good. how long will you stay?”

“how do i know! perhaps for ever.”

“that’s a big word—though it has only two syllables.”

it cut bertha to the heart that edward should be so indifferent—he could not care for her at all. he seemed to think it natural that she should leave him, pretending it was good for her health. oh, what did she care about her health! as she made the needful preparations her courage failed her, and she felt it impossible to go. tears came as she thought of the difference between their present state and the ardent love of a year before. she would have welcomed the poorest excuse that forced her to stay, and yet saved her self-respect. if edward would only express grief at the parting, it might not be too late. but her boxes were packed and her train fixed; he told miss glover that his wife was going away for a change of air, and regretted that his farm prevented him from accompanying her. the trap was brought to the door, and edward jumped up, taking his seat. now there was no hope, and go she must. she wished for courage to tell edward that she could not leave him, but was afraid. they drove along in silence; bertha waited for her husband to speak, daring to say nothing herself, lest he should hear the tears in her voice. at last she made an effort.

“are you sorry i’m going?”

“i think it’s for your good—and i don’t want to stand in the way of that.”

bertha asked herself what love a man had for his wife, who could bear her out of his sight, no matter what the necessity. she stifled a sigh.

they reached the station and he took her ticket. they waited in silence for the train, and edward bought punch and the sketch from a newspaper boy. the horrible train steamed up; edward helped her into a carriage, and the tears in her eyes now could not be concealed. she put out her lips.

“perhaps for the last time,” she whispered.

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