21 daphne, ellen—and miss grayling

miss grayling made her way to the san. she spoke to matron, who nodded. “yes, daphne is quite all right now. she has just got up.”

the head mistress told matron to take daphne into the next room, where they would be alone. daphne went, helped along by matron, and sat down in an armchair, wondering rather fearfully what the visit was about. miss grayling looked so serious.

“daphne,” said the head, “these things were found in the parcel that mary-lou went to post for you. you had packed them up yourself. where did you get them? and why did you want to send them away?”

she suddenly tipped the purses and the little boxes on to daphne’s knee. the girl stared at them in absolute horror. she went very pale and opened her mouth to speak. but no words came.

“shall i tell you where you got them from?” said miss grayling. “you took them out of desks and lockers and drawers. you spent the money, daphne. you did, in fact, exactly what you have done in two other schools, which had quietly intimated to your parents that they would rather have you removed. but they did not tell your parents why.”

“how did you know?” whispered daphne, her once pretty face white and haggard.

“it is the custom at malory towers to get a confidential report of any new girl’s character from her previous head mistress,” said miss grayling. “we do not, if we can help it, take girls of bad character, daphne.”

“why did you take me then?” asked daphne, not daring to meet the head’s eyes.

“because, daphne, your last head mistress said that you were not all bad,” said miss grayling. “she said that perhaps a fresh start in a fine school like this, with its traditions of service for others, for justice, kindliness and truthfulness, might help you to cancel out the bad and develop the good. and i like to give people a chance.”

“i see,” said daphne. “but i’m worse than you think, miss grayling. i haven’t only stolen—i’ve told lies. i said i’d never been to another school before, because i was afraid the girls might get to know i’d been sent home twice from schools. i pretended my people were very rich. i—i had a photo on my dressing-table that wasn’t my mother at all—it was a very grand picture of a beautiful woman . . .”

“i know,” said miss grayling. “the staff were warned about you, but not the girls. i have heard many things that made me sad, daphne, made me think that you did not deserve the chance you had been given. your greatest drawback is your prettiness—you want to make people admire you, you want to make them think you come of handsome, distinguished parents, from a wealthy home—you have to have envy and admiration, don’t you? and because your parents are not as grand as you feel they ought to be, with you for a daughter, and cannot afford to give you as much pocket-money and pretty things as the others, you take what you want—you steal.”

“i’m no good,” said daphne, and she looked down at her hands. “i know that. i’m just no good.”

“and yet you have done a very brave thing,” said miss grayling. “look at me, please, daphne. the girls admire you today—they call you a heroine. they want to cheer you and clap you. you have plenty of good in you!”

daphne had raised her head and was looking at miss grayling. she flushed. “i’m to blame for what happened to mary-lou,” she said. “when i heard that ellen had been expelled for stealing the things i had really stolen myself, i was afraid. i was too much of a coward to own up—but i thought if the empty purses and the boxes were found, my finger-prints would be on them and i’d be found out. so i thought i’d send them away by post, to a made-up address. and mary-lou knew i was anxious to get the parcel off and that’s how she met her accident.”

“i see,” said miss grayling. “i wondered why you sent away the things, daphne. it is a great mercy that you found mary-lou when you did. otherwise your foolishness and wrong-doing might have caused a great tragedy.”

“i suppose you will be sending me home, miss grayling,” said daphne, after a pause. “my parents will have to know why. they will guess there is some serious reason. they don’t pay my fees you know, they couldn’t afford to. my godmother does. if she knows about this, she will stop paying for my education; i shall have spoilt my whole life. am i to be sent away, miss grayling?”

“i am going to let the girls decide that,” said miss grayling, gravely. “that is, if you are brave enough to let them, daphne. i want you to go to the second form and tell them the whole story. confess everything to them and see what they say.”

“oh, i can’t,” said daphne, and covered her face with her hands. “after all i’ve said—and boasted! i can’t!”

“well, you have the choice,” said miss grayling getting up. “either i send you home without any more ado—or you put yourself in the hands of your school fellows. it is a hard thing to do, but if you really want to make amends, you will do it. you have some good in you. now is your chance to show it, even if it means being braver than you were last night!”

she left daphne and went in to see ellen. she sat down by her bed. “ellen,” she said, “daphne is in great trouble. the others will know soon and i have come to tell you myself. it has been discovered that it was she who took all that money and the jewellery that was missing.”

it took a moment for this to sink into ellen’s mind. then she sat up. “daphne! but the girls thought it was i who took them! they accused me. they’ll never believe it was daphne.”

“they will,” said miss grayling, “because i rather think daphne herself is going to tell them! and now, ellen, tell me—what made you take those test-papers the other night? you are a scholarship girl with brains—you did not need to cheat.”

ellen lay down again suddenly. she was overcome with shame. how did miss grayling know? had darrell told everyone then? of course she had.

“nobody knows except darrell and myself,” said miss grayling. “darrell told me, but told no one else. so you need not worry. but i want to know why you did it. there is something you are worrying about, ellen, and these headaches of yours won’t go until you are at peace with yourself and have lost whatever worry it is you have.”

“i did need to cheat,” said ellen, in a small voice. “my brains wouldn’t work any more. and i got these headaches. i knew i wouldn’t even pass the tests—and the girls that night accused me of being a thief, which i wasn’t—and i got all hopeless and thought that i might as well be a cheat if they all thought i was a thief!”

“i see,” said miss grayling. “but why wouldn’t your brain work any more?”

“i don’t know,” said ellen. “because i’d worked it a bit too hard, i expect, when i went in for the scholarship. you see, miss grayling, i’m not really brilliant. i get good results because i slog so—i go on and on, working and studying, where perhaps a real scholarship girl can get better results with half the work. i worked all through the hols. too. i was tired when i got here—but i did so badly want to do well my first term.”

“did it matter so much?” asked miss grayling, gently.

“yes,” said ellen. “i didn’t want to let my people down. they’ve had to pay out more than they can afford really for my uniform and things. they’re so proud of me. i must do well. and now i’ve ruined everything.”

“not quite!” said miss grayling, feeling very much relieved to find that simple overwork was at the root of ellen’s trouble, and worry about what her family would think. “i shall write your parents a letter to tell them that you have worked hard and done well, but that you are over-strained and must have a real holiday when it comes. by next term you will be quite fresh again and you will have forgotten all this and be ready to rush up to the top of the form!”

ellen smiled at the head, and the little worried cleft in her forehead disappeared like magic. “thank you,” she said gratefully. “i’d like to say a lot more, but i can’t.”

miss grayling popped in to have a word with mary-lou, and then went back to her own quarters. so many girls—so many problems—so much responsibility in putting things right, and getting the best out of every girl! no wonder miss grayling had more grey hairs than she should have had.