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The Art of Being Happy

LETTER XVIII. THE PLEASURES OF THE HEART.
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the creator has put forth in his gifts, a magnificence which should impress our hearts. what variety in those affectionate sentiments, of the delights of which our natures are susceptible! without going out of the family circle, i enumerate filial piety, fraternal affection, friendship, love, and parental tenderness. these different sentiments can all co?xist in our hearts, and, so far from weakening each other, each tends to give vigor and intensity to the other. no doubt, the need of so many affections[135] and props attests our feebleness and dependence. but i can scarcely conceive of the happiness, which a being, impassible to weaknesses and wants, could find in himself. i am ready to bless that infirmity of our natures, which is the source of such pure pleasures, and such tender affections.

let us avoid confounding that sensibility which exacts the pleasures of the heart, with that which produces impassioned characters. they differ as essentially as the genial, vital warmth, from the burning of a fever. indolence, objects calculated strongly to strike the imagination, and those maxims which corrupt the understanding, develope a vague and ardent sensibility, which sometimes conducts to crime, and always to misery. the other species is approved by reason and preserved by virtue. we owe to it those pure emotions which impart upon earth an indistinct sentiment of the joys of heaven.

there are men, however, who dread genuine sensibility; and, under the conviction that it will multiply their pains, study to eradicate the germs of it from their soul.

hume was unhappily an unbeliever; but i might easily cite from his life many honorable traits indicative of a good natural disposition. he remarked to a friend, who confided to him his secret sorrows, ‘you entertain an internal enemy, who will always hinder you from being happy. it is your sensibility of heart.’ ‘what!’ responded his friend with a kind of terror, ‘have you not sensibility?’ ‘no. my reason alone speaks, and it declares that it is right to soothe distress.’

in listening to this reply of hume, we are at once struck with the idea, that the greater part of those who[136] adopt his principles, do not pause at the same point with their model. they sink into that heartless class, who see all human calamities with a dry eye, provided they have no tendency to abridge their own enjoyments.

suppose even that they pursue the lessons of the scotch philosopher to better purpose; and without any emotion, without any impulse of heart, hold out a succoring hand to those who suffer. this, perhaps, may answer the claims of reason. but the social instinct will always repel that austere morality, which would give to the human heart an unnatural insensibility, and deprive it, if i may so say, of its amiable weakness. i would hardly desire to see a man oppose a courage, too stoical, to his own miseries. the natural tears which he sheds in extreme affliction, are his guaranty for the sympathy which he will feel for my sorrows.

it is a vile but common maxim, that two conditions are necessary to success in life. the one is, to have a selfish heart. the other, the adage of egotism, is, that to avoid suffering, we must stifle sensibility. i say to these heartless philosophers of the world, that if the only requisite is to avoid suffering, through destitution of feeling, to die is the surest method of all.[40]

the secret of happiness does not consist in avoiding all evils; for in that case, we must learn to love nothing. if there be a lot on earth worthy of envy, it is that of a man, good and tender hearted, who beholds his own creation in the happiness of all who surround him. let him who would be happy, strive to encircle himself with happy beings. let the happiness of his family be the incessant object of his thoughts. let him divine the sorrows and anticipate the wishes of his friends. let him[137] inspire the fidelity of affection in his domestics, by pledging to them a comfortable and pleasant old age. let him, as far as may be, preserve the same servants, and give them all needed succor and counsel. in fine, let the inmates and dependents of the house all respire a calm and regulated happiness. let even the domestic animals know, that humanity presides over their condition.

entertaining such views, it will be easy to see in what light i contemplate those men who take pleasure in witnessing the combats of animals. what man who has a heart, can see spectacles, equally barbarous and detestable, with satisfaction; such as dogs tearing to pieces a bull, exhausted with wounds, cocks mangling each other, the encounter of brutal boxers, or of bad boys in the streets, encouraged to the diabolical sport of fighting? these are the true schools of cowardly and savage ferocity, and not of manly courage, as too many have supposed.[41] but it is not my purpose to draw a painting in detail of the abominations of cruelty, or the pleasures of beneficence, and i resume my rapid and desultory reflections.

to preserve the sentiments of beneficence and sensibility, let us avoid the pride which mars them. beneficence in one respect resembles love. like that, it courts concealment and the shade.

the most useful direction we can give to beneficence is, to multiply its gifts as widely as possible. let us avoid imitating those men who are always fearful of being deceived by those who solicit their pity. in an uncertainty whether or not you ought to extend succor, grant it. it can only expose you to the error that is least subject to repentance.[42]

[138]

offer useful counsels and indulgent consolations. save, from despair, the unfortunate victim, who groans under the remorse of an unpremeditated fault. unite him again to society by those cords which his imprudence has broken. rekindle in him the love of his kind, by saying to him, ‘though you may not recover innocence, repentance can at least restore your virtue.’

if we have access to the opulent and powerful, we have an honorable, but difficult task to fulfil. to assume the often thankless office of soliciting frequent favors for friends, without losing the consideration necessary to success, requires peculiar tact, discernment and dignity.—above all, it requires disinterested zeal. in attempting this delicate duty in the form of letters, we may soon dissipate our slender fund of credit. letters of recommendation resemble a paper currency. they are redeemed in specie so long as they are issued discreetly, and in small amounts, but which become worse than blank paper, as soon as we multiply them too far.[43]

such is the intrinsic attraction of beneficence, that even if we refuse to practise it, we still love whatever retraces its image. a romance affects us. pathetic scenes soften our hearts at the theatre. in thus embracing the shadow, we pay a sublime testimonial to the substance.

the example of beneficence so readily finds its way to every heart, that we are affected even in thinking of those who practise it. the coldest hearts pay a tribute of veneration to those women, who, in consecrating themselves to the service of the poor and the sick, encounter extreme fatigue, disgust, and often abuse from the wretched objects themselves, in the squalidness and filth of[139] prisons and hospitals. how beautiful to learn to put forth patience to mitigate the maladies of the body, and hope, to soothe those of the mind![44] ye, who practise virtues thus touching and sublime, may well hope the highest recompenses of heaven. such alone are worthy of your pure spirits. ye seem to have passed in light across our dark sphere, only to fulfil a transient and celestial mission, to return again to your country.

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