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Si Klegg, Complete, Books 1-6

CHAPTER XVI. ONE OF THE "NON-COMMISH"
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a night's adventures as "corporal of the guard."

"corporal klegg, you will go on duty to-night with the camp guard!" said the orderly of co. q one evening, as the 200th ind. filed off into a piece of woods to bivouac for the night, two or three days after si had been promoted.

the chevrons on his arms had raised si several degrees in the estimation not only of himself, but of the other members of the company. his conduct in the skirmish had shown that he had in him the material for a good soldier, and even the orderly began to treat him with that respect due to his new rank as one of the "non-commish."

like every other man who put on the army blue and marched away so bold, "with gay and gallant tread," si could not tell whether he was going to amount to anything as a soldier until he had gone through the test of being under fire. there were many men who walked very erect, talked bravely, drilled well, and made a fine appearance on dress parade, before they reached "the front," but who wilted at the "zip" of bullets like tender corn blades nipped by untimely frost. and a good many of them continued in that wilted condition. perhaps they really couldn't help it. an inscrutable providence had seen fit to omit putting any "sand in their gizzards," as the boys expressed it.

it must be confessed that si was somewhat unduly elated and puffed up over, his own achievements as a skirmisher and his success in climbing the ladder of military rank and fame. it is true, it wasn't much of a fight they had that day, but si thought it was pretty fair for a starter, and enough to prove to both himself and his comrades that he wouldn't be one of the "coffee coolers" when there was business on hand.

si was sorry that his regiment did not get into the fight at perryville. the 200th ind. belonged to one of the two corps of buell's army that lay under the trees two or three miles away all through that october afternoon, while mccook's gallant men were in a life-and-death struggle against overwhelming odds. it bothered si as much to understand it all as it did 30,000 other soldiers that day.

si responded with alacrity when he was detailed for guard duty. he had walked a beat once or twice as a common tramp, and had not found it particularly pleasant, especially in stormy weather; but now he was a peg higher, and he thought as corporal he would have a better time. he had already observed that the rude winds of army life were tempered, if not to the shorn lambs, at least to the officers, in a degree proportionate to their rank. the latter had the first pick of everything, and the men took what was left. the officers always got the softest rails to sleep on, the hardtack that was least tunneled through by the worms, the bacon that had the fewest maggots, and the biggest trees in a fight.

"forward—march!" shouted the officer in command, when the detachment was ready. si stepped off very proudly, thinking how glad his good old mother and sister marier and pretty annabel would be if they could see him at that moment. he was determined to discharge his official duties "right up to the handle," and make the boys stand around in lively style.

when the guard reached the place selected for headquarters the officer drily lectured them in regard to their duties, impressing upon them the necessity of being alert and vigilant. there was only a thin picket-line between them and the enemy. the safety of the army depended upon the faithfulness of those appointed to watch while others slept. he gave them the countersign, "bunker hill," and ordered them under no circumstances to allow any person to pass without giving it, not even the commanding general himself.

then the guards were posted, the "beats" laid off and numbered, and as the fast-gathering shadows deepened among the trees the sentinels paced to and fro around the tired army.

for an hour or two after the guards were stationed all was quiet along the line. the noise of the great camp was hushed for the night, and no sound broke the stillness of the gloomy forest. the moon rose and peeped timidly through the branches.

"corporal of the guard; post no. 6."

si's quick ear, as he lay curled up at the foot of a tree, caught these words, rapidly repeated by one sentinel after another. it was his first summons. he sprang to his feet, gun in hand, his heart beating at the thought of adventure, and started on the run for "post no. 6."

"what's up?" he said to the guard, with a perceptible tremor in his voice.

"there's one o' the boys tryin' to run the guards!" was the answer. "he's been out foragin', i reckon. he's got a lot o' plunder he wants to git into camp with. see him, out there in the bush?"

the forager, for such he proved to be, was nimbly dodging from tree to tree, watching for a chance to cross the line, but the alertness of the' guards had thus far kept him outside. he had tried to bribe one or two of the boys by offering to "whack up" if they would let him pass or give him the countersign, so that he could get in at some other point in the cordon. but the guards were incorruptible. they were "fresh" yet, and had not caught on to the plan of accepting an offered chicken, a section of succulent pig, or a few sweet potatoes, and then walking off to the remote limit of the beat, with eyes to the front, while the forager shot across the line in safety. they learned all about this after a while.

the raider tried to parley with si, but si wouldn't have it. raising his gun to a "ready" he ordered the man to come in or he would put a hole through him.

the best thing to do under the circumstances was to obey. the forager, who belonged to si's company, crept up to corporal klegg and in a conciliatory tone opened negotiations.

"you jest let me pass, and you may have your pick of this stuff," said he, holding up a fowl in one hand and a ham in the other. "it'll be all right, and nobody 'll ever know nothin' 'bout it!"

si hesitated; it was human nature. the offer was a tempting one, but he remembered his responsibility to his country, and his stomach appealed in vain. duty came before stewed chicken or roasted sparerib.

"can't do it!" said si. "you've got hold of the wrong man this time. i ain't goin' to have nobody monkeyin' 'round while i'm corporal of this 'ere guard. come along with me, and step out lively, too!"

si marched the culprit back to headquarters and delivered him up to the officer, who commended si for his fidelity.

next day the ground back of the colonel's tent was strewn with feathers, chicken bones, ham rinds, and potato skins, while the unlucky forager who had provided the field officers' mess with such a royal meal was humped around for two hours on "knapsack drill," and condemned to spend 24 hours in the guard-house.

an hour later si had another experience. the captain of co. q felt a kindly interest, and not a little pride in him, since the skirmish, and he thought he would take a turn that night and see whether his newly-made corporal was "up to snuff."

"post no. 3," was si's second call. he responded promptly, and as he approached the guard the latter said:

"corporal, here's the cap'n, and he wants to get in! he hain't got the countersign; shall i pass him?"

"good evening. corporal!" said the captain, as si came up, at the same time extending his hand.

si was thrown completely off his guard. dropping the butt of his gun carelessly to the ground he replied cheerily, "good evening, cap'n," touching his hat by way of salute. then he took the proffered hand, pleased at the captain's mark of kindly recognition. he didn't understand the scheme then. "how are you getting on, mr. klegg?" "first rate!" said si, with the air of one conscious that he had done his duty well. "i capchered a forager a little bit ago and took him to headquarters!"

one of the 'non-com mish.' 159

"well done, corporal i have no doubt you will honor the good name of the 200th ind. in general and company q in particular, i got caught outside to night, and i want to get back into camp. of course, you know me and it's all right!"

"certainly, sir!" said si, as he stood leaning on his gun and allowed the officer to pass the magic line. "good night, cap'n!"

"good night, corporal! by the way," said the captain, retracing his steps, "i notice that you do not carry your gun just right. let me show you how to handle it!"

si didn't know what a flagrant offense it was for a soldier on guard to let his gun go out of his hands; nor had he the faintest suspicion that the captain was playing it on him. so he promptly handed his picee to the captain, who immediately brought it down to a "charge," with the bayonet at si's breast.

"suppose, now, i was a rebel in disguise," said the captain, "what kind of a fix would you be in?"

light began to dawn upon si, and he started back in terror at the thought of the mistake he had made.

"of course, i wouldn't let anybody else have it," he stammered; "but i knew you, cap'n!"

"that makes no difference to a man on duty. corporal. you hang on to your gun the rest of the night, and if anybody—i don't care if it's gen. buell himself—insists on your giving it to him, let him have two or three inches of the point of your bayonet. don't let anybody pass without the countersign, either! come to my quarters when you are relieved tomorrow."

all this illustrates the way the officers had of testing new soldiers and teaching them a thing or two, when, as was frequently the case, they were not yet up to the mark. a trick of extra duty for the hapless novitiate was generally the penance for his simplicity.

the cold chills ran up and down si's back as he took his gun and slowly returned to the guard fire. he felt that he had utterly spoiled his good record.

"lieutenant," he said to the officer, "i wish you'd please detail a man to kick me for about an hour."

the lieutenant wanted to know what the matter was, and si told him all about it, ending with:

"so now i s'pose the cap'n 'll yank the stripes off'n my blouse!"

the officer quieted his fears by assuring him that there was no cause for alarm. the captain knew that he was trying to do his duty, and what he had done was for si's own good.

si sat down by the fire and was thinking it over when there was another call, "corporal of the guard!" he was soon at the point indicated and found two officers on horseback, whom he recognized as the colonel and adjutant of the 200th ind. si's friend shorty was the guard who had halted them.

"now, corporal klegg," said si to himself, laying his finger alongside his nose, "you jist watch out this time. here's big game! shouldn't wonder if them ossifers had bin out skylarkin', and they're tryin' to git in. don't ye let 'em fool ye as the cap'n did!"

si was right in his surmise. the colonel and adjutant had been enjoying a good supper at a house half a mile away, and had not the slightest idea what the countersign was.

si was determined not to "get left" this time. as he approached, the colonel saw that it was soldier he had commended for his gallantry at the time of the skirmish.

"ah, corporal klegg, i'm glad to see you so prompt in your duty. i was sure we had made no mistake when we promoted you. of course, you can see who i am. i'm your colonel, and this is the adjutant. we are, unfortunately, outside without the countersign; but you can just let us through."

the colonel's taffy had no effect on si. he just brought himself into a hostile attitude, with his bayonet in fair range of the colonel, as he replied:

"colonel, my orders is to pass no livin' man unless he says 'bunker hill.' i'd be glad to do ye a good turn, but there's no use talkin'. i'm goin' to obey orders, and ye can't pass here."

'not 'less ye say 'bunker hill.'' 155

the colonel chuckled softly as he dismounted and came up to si.

"it's all right," he said, "of course i know what the countersign is. i was only trying you."

"hold on there," said si, "don't come too close. if you've got the countersign, advance and give it. if ye ain't got it, i'll jest call the officer of the guard!"

leaning over the point of si's bayonet the colonel gently whispered "bunker hill".

"correct!" said si, and bringing his gun to a shoulder, he respectfully saluted the colonel. the latter started to remount, but turned back as he said:

"just let me show you how to hold your gun. you don't—"

"not if the court knows herself," said si, again menacing the colonel with his bayonet. "that's bin played on me once to-night, and if anybody does it again my name ain't si klegg!"

"that's right, corporal," said the colonel as he sprang into the saddle; "but don't tell anybody what the countersign is again! good night!"

"good night. colonel," said si, touching his hat. as the officers rode away si began to think he had put his foot in it again. he was confirmed in this opinion by seeing shorty sit down on a log in a paroxysm of laughter.

"you give yerself away bad this time!" said shorty, as soon as he could speak. "what did ye tell him the countersign for?"

"whew-w-w-w!" observed si, with a prolonged whistle. "shorty," said he, "i wish you'd take a club and see if you can't pound a little sense into me; i don't believe i've got any!" without another word he shouldered his gun and returned to the guard headquarters. "now i'm a goner, sure!" he said to himself.

on his way he found a guard sitting by a tree, sound asleep. carefully taking away his gun si awoke him, and frightened him half to death by telling him that he would report him and he would be shot for sleeping on post. si finally said he wouldn't tell on him this time, but he must never do so again, or he would be a dead man.

"corporal of the guard!" was heard again, sometime after midnight. "if they try any more measly tricks on me to-night somebody 'll git hurt!" thought si as he walked briskly along the line in response to the call.

this time it was a "contraband"—an old negro, who stood shivering with terror as the guard held him at the point of the bayonet. recalling the unlucky adventures of the night. si imagined that it was one of the officers, who had blackened himself like a minstrel, and had come there purposely to "catch him."

"ye can't get through unless ye've got the counter sign," said he, decisively; "and i shan't give it to ye, nuther! and ye needn't try to show me how to hold my gun! i can handle it well enough to shoot and punch the bayonet!"

"don't know what dat all means, boss," said the frightened negro; "but fer de good lawd's sake don't shove dat t'ing frew me. i've only bin ober to de nex' place to a 'possum roast and i'se jist gwine home. i didn't know dese yer ge-yards was heah!"

si didn't propose to take any chances, and so he marched the old contraband back and delivered him to the officer, who kept him till morning and then suffered him to go on his way.

once more that night si was called, in addition to his tramps with the "reliefs" and the "grand rounds." it was, perhaps, an hour before daylight, and shorty was the guard who called him. he told si there was something walking around in the woods, and he believed it was a rebel trying to creep up on them. he had challenged two or three times, but got no answer. the moon had gone down, and in the dark woods objects at any distance could not be distinguished.

"there, d'ye hear that?" said shorty, as there came a sound of crackling sticks and rustling leaves.

"halt!" exclaimed si. "who comes there?"

there was no response, and si challenged again with like result.

"shorty," said si, "let's fire both together," and crack went their muskets.

for a moment there was a great floundering, and then all was still. as soon as it was light, and shorty was relieved, he and si went out to see the result of their fire. to their astonishment they found the prowler cold and stiff in death—they had shot a big gray mule.

they had shot a mule 163

on the whole, it was a busy and interesting night for si. he did not lose his chevrons on account of his mistakes. but he learned something, and the lesson was impressed upon his mind by a few kindly words of caution and advice from the captain of co. q.

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