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The Backwoods Boy

CHAPTER XXVII. ANECDOTES OF MR. LINCOLN.
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a man’s character often is best disclosed by trifling incidents, and it is for this reason, perhaps, that the public is eager to read anecdotes of its illustrious men. i shall devote the present chapter to anecdotes of president lincoln, gathered from various quarters. i shall not use quotation-marks, but content myself with saying at the outset that they are all borrowed.

at the reception at the president’s house one afternoon, many persons present noticed three little girls poorly dressed, the children of some mechanic or laboring man, who had followed the visitors fully into the house to gratify their curiosity. they passed round from room to room, and were hastening through the reception-room with some trepidation when the president called{247} to them, “little girls, are you going to pass me without shaking hands?”

then he bent his tall, awkward form down, and shook each little girl warmly by the hand. everybody in the apartment was spell-bound by the incident—so simple in itself, yet revealing so much of mr. lincoln’s character.

the president and the paymaster.

one of the numerous paymasters at washington sought an introduction to mr. lincoln. he arrived at the white house quite opportunely, and was introduced to the president by the united states marshal, with his blandest smile. while shaking hands with the president the paymaster remarked:

“i have no official business with you, mr. president; i only called to pay my compliments.”

“i understand,” was the reply, “and, from the complaints of the soldiers, i think that is all you do pay.”

the interviewer.

an interviewer, with the best intentions in the world, once went to mr. lincoln’s room in the{248} white house while he was president, and inquired:

“mr. president, what do you think of the war and its end?”

to which mr. lincoln politely and laughingly replied:

“that question of yours puts me in mind of a story about something which happened down in egypt, in the southern part of illinois.”

the point of it was that a man burned his fingers by being in too much haste. mr. lincoln told the story admirably well, walking up and down the room, and heartily laughing all the while. the interviewer was quick to see the point. as a matter of course he was cut to the quick, and quickly down-stairs he rushed, saying to himself:

“i’ll never interview that man again.”

how mr. lincoln secured a ride.

when abraham lincoln was a poor lawyer, he found himself one cold day at a village some distance from springfield, and with no means of conveyance.

seeing a gentleman driving along the springfield{249} road in a carriage, he ran up to him and politely said:

“sir, will you have the goodness to take my overcoat to town for me?”

“with pleasure,” answered the gentleman. “but how will you get it again?”

“oh, very easily,” said mr. lincoln, “as i intend to remain in it.”

“jump in,” said the gentleman laughing. and the future president had a pleasant ride.

the president’s influence.

judge baldwin, of california, an old and highly respectable and sedate gentleman, called on general halleck, and, presuming on a familiar acquaintance in california a few years since, solicited a pass outside of the lines to see a brother in virginia, not thinking he would meet with a refusal, as both his brother and himself were good union men.

“we have been deceived too often,” said general halleck, “and i regret i can’t grant it.”

judge b. then went to stanton, and was very briefly disposed of with the same result.{250}

finally he obtained an interview with mr. lincoln and stated his case.

“have you applied to general halleck?” said the president.

“and met with a flat refusal,” said judge b.

“then you must see stanton,” continued the president.

“i have, and with the same result,” was the reply.

“well, then,” said the president, with a smile of good humor, “i can do nothing, for you must know that i have very little influence with this administration.”

the german lieutenant.

a lieutenant, whom debts compelled to leave his father-land, succeeded in being admitted to president lincoln, and, by reason of his commendable and winning deportment and intelligent appearance, was promised a lieutenant’s commission in a cavalry regiment.

he was so enraptured with his success, that he deemed it a duty to inform the president that he belonged to one of the oldest noble houses in germany.{251}

“oh, never mind that,” said mr. lincoln, with a twinkle of the eye; “you will not find that to be any obstacle to your advancement.”

a pass for richmond.

a gentleman called on the president, and solicited a pass for richmond.

“well,” said mr. lincoln, “i would be very happy to oblige you if my passes were respected; but the fact is, sir, i have, within the last two years, given passes to two hundred and fifty thousand men to go to richmond, and not one has got there yet.”

mr. lincoln and the preacher.

an officer under the government called at the executive mansion, accompanied by a clerical friend.

“mr. president,” said he, “allow me to present to you my friend, the rev. mr. f., of ——. mr. f. has expressed a desire to see you, and have some conversation with you, and i am happy to be the means of introducing him.”

the president shook hands with mr. f., desired him to be seated, and took a seat himself. {252}then—his countenance having assumed an expression of patient waiting—he said: “i am now ready to hear what you have to say.”

“oh, bless you, sir,” said mr. f., “i have nothing special to say. i merely called to pay my respects to you, and, as one of the million, to assure you of my hearty sympathy and support.”

“my dear sir,” said the president, rising promptly, his face showing instant relief, and with both hands grasping that of his visitor, “i am very glad to see you; i am very glad to see you, indeed. i thought you had come to preach to me.”

mr. lincoln and his advisers.

some gentlemen from the west waited upon the president. they were in a critical mood. they felt that things were not going on as they should, and they wanted to give advice. the president heard them patiently, and then replied:

“gentlemen, suppose all the property you were worth was in gold, and you had put it in the hands of blondin to carry across the niagara river on a rope; would you shake the cable, or keep shouting out to him—‘blondin, stand up a{253} little straighter!’ ‘blondin, stoop a little more!’ ‘go a little faster!’ ‘lean a little more to the north!’ ‘lean a little more to the south!’ no, you would hold your breath as well as your tongue, and keep your hands off till he was safely over. the government is carrying an immense weight. untold treasures are in its hands. it is doing the best it can. don’t badger it. keep silence, and we’ll get you safe across.”

this simple illustration answered the complaints of half an hour, and not only silenced but charmed the audience.

somewhat similar is the answer made to a western farmer, who waited upon mr. lincoln, with a plan for the successful prosecution of the war, to which the president listened with as much patience as he could. when he was through, he asked the opinion of the president upon his plan.

“well,” said mr. lincoln, “i’ll answer by telling you a story. you have heard of mr. blank, of chicago? he was an immense loafer in his way—in fact, never did anything in his life. one day he got crazy over a great rise in the price of wheat, upon which many wheat speculators gained large fortunes. blank started off one morning to{254} one of the most successful of the wheat speculators, and, with much enthusiasm, laid before him a plan by which he (the said blank) was certain of becoming independently rich. when he had finished he asked the opinion of his hearer upon his plan of operations. the reply came as follows: ‘i advise you to stick to your business.’ ‘but,’ asked blank, ‘what is my business?’ ‘i don’t know, i’m sure, what it is,’ said the merchant, ‘but whatever it is, i advise you to stick to it.’

“and now,” said mr. lincoln, “i mean nothing offensive, for i know you mean well, but i think you had better stick to your business, and leave the war to those who have the responsibility of managing it.”

it is said that mr. gladstone, the english premier, is known for his skill in chopping wood. the following anecdote shows that president lincoln also was not without experience in the same direction:

during one of the last visits that he made to james river, a short time before the capture of richmond, he spent some time in walking around among the hospitals, and in visiting various fatigue{255} parties at work in putting up cabins and other buildings.

he came upon one squad who were cutting logs for a house; and chatting a moment with the hardy woodsmen, asked one of them to let him take his axe. mr. lincoln grasped the helve with the easy air of one perfectly familiar with the tool, and remarked that he used to be “good on the chop.”

the president then let in on a big log, making the chips fly, and making as smooth a cut as the best lumberman in maine could do.

meantime, the men crowded round to see the work; and, as he handed back the axe, and walked away with a pleasant joke, the choppers gave him three as hearty cheers as he ever heard in the whole of his political career.

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