chapter xix

minehead, new and old—selworthy—the horner

scarce two miles distant from dunster is minehead, the hamlet of alcombe lying between the two. minehead, a group of three so-called “towns,” quay town, lower town, and upper town, occupies a position on the gently curving flat shore sheltered on the west by the bold, abrupt headland of north hill, rising to a height of 843 feet. north hill is so striking a feature in all views of the town, that one comes unconsciously to regard it as the only typical outstanding feature of the place. it is, so far as pictures go, minehead. a noble hill it is, with the old quayside houses of the original fisher-village and ancient little port nestling beneath it. immemorially a swelling green hillside, seamed and lined irregularly with hedgerows roughly into a chessboard pattern, it is distressing nowadays to find it being studded with villas and scarred with roads.

for to this complexion has minehead come at last; development into a seaside resort. but a few years since, and here you had a scattered, unspoiled village. to-day, by favour of the 228luttrells, who own the land, and because the railway is handy, the terminus station being, in fact, on the beach, the builder is walking, splay-footed, all over it, and hotels have arisen on the front, and there is a bandstand, there are seaside “entertainers,” and there are pickpockets among the crowds thus being “entertained”; with the result that numerous visitors have to remain in pawn at their lodgings until such time as they receive fresh supplies. this it is to be up-to-date! among other up-to-date doings is the covering of the roads with asphalte, so that visitant motor-cars shall not stir up the dust; the result being that the roads so treated have an evilly dirty appearance and a worse stink. they look, and probably are, dangerous to health.

the old scattered quay town, lower town, and upper town, with their time-honoured cob-walled, whitewashed cottages, are being surely enmeshed together in an upstart network of new roads and uncharacteristic villas that might be in suburban london, rather than in somerset; and the queer old custom house, built in like manner on the quay, and a little larger than a tool-shed, has been wantonly destroyed to make an approach to a pleasure pier, built in an impossible situation, so that visitors are pleased not to go upon it. so much—and more than enough too—of modern minehead.

minehead.

history-books tell us of strange doings in the old town. thus in 1265, on a sunday, the wild welsh, under one william of berkeley, came 229across channel very numerously and pillaged the surrounding country before a force could be despatched to deal with them. the reckoning was perhaps not a ready one, but it seems to have been complete; the constable of dunster, one adam of gurdon, meeting and defeating them and driving them and their captain into the sea, wherein those who had not perished by the sword were drowned.

in olden times this was the seat of a not inconsiderable trade. woollens were exported hence, and a large business was done in herrings sent to mediterranean ports, which bought annually some 4,000 barrels. hence the ancient armorial bearings of minehead; a sailing ship and a woolpack.

seventeenth-century mantel, “luttrell arms” inn.

a curious incident in the annals of minehead in days of old is that of the furious onslaught of the church upon an unfortunate lad, a native of the place, who, sailing in a ship afterwards captured by turkish pirates, was taken prisoner, and his life spared on condition that he embraced the mohammedan religion. the desirability of life, and the practical certainty of this youthful sailor that one religion was as good as another, when a choice was offered between death and the acceptance of a new creed, may perhaps be readily understood. but the youth’s refusal to add himself to the noble army of martyrs outraged the susceptibilities of the flatulent divines of the period, who, when he at last returned home and told his story, made so great an affair of it that 230nothing would properly serve the occasion but a public recantation of error. we may, therefore, 231vividly picture to ourselves that scene in minehead church on sunday, march 16th, 1627, when the more or less penitent, but certainly very frightened and astonished, lad was had in front of the pulpit, before the whole congregation, and, standing there in the turkish breeches in which he had returned home, made to listen to the windy discourse of the reverend mr. edward kellet, who preached the sermon afterwards printed under the title of a return from argier. we may presume “algiers” to be meant; but early seventeenth-century folk were more than a little uncertain in these matters. the central, harrowing fact of this occasion was, however, the length of that homily, which fills seventy-eight closely printed pages, and must therefore have occupied considerably over an hour in delivery. this is the manner of it, as set forth by the printer and published and sold in paternoster row for the edification of the godly:

“a return from argier: a sermon preached at minhead, in the county of somerset, the 16th of march, 1627, the re-admission of a relapsed christian into our church. by edward kellet, doctor of divinity.”

for the benefit of purchasers in london and elsewhere, who were not acquainted with the circumstances, the following explanation was made to preface the sermon:—

“a countryman of ours goinge from the port of mynhead in somersetshire, bound for the streights, was taken by turkish pyrats, and 232made a slave at argier, and liuing there in slauerie, by frailty and weaknesse, forsooke the christian religion, and turned turke, and liued so some yeares; and in that time seruing in a turkish ship, which was taken by an englishman of warre, was brought backe againe to mynhead, where being made to vnderstand the grieuousnesse of his apostacy, was very penitent for the same, and desired to be reconciled to the church, into which he was admitted by the authority of the lord bishop of that dioces, with aduise of some great and learned prelates of this kingdome and was enioyned pennance for his apostacy: and at his admission, and performance thereof, these two sermons were preached the third sunday in lent, anno 1627, one the forenoone, the other in the afternoone.”

jeremy 3. 22. “return, ye backsliding children, and i will heal your backslidings. behold, we come unto thee, for thou art the lord our god.”

the amount of pedantic verbiage in the reverend mr. kellet’s hour-long discourse is really appalling. that his congregation comprehended even the half of it is not to be supposed, and that the “penitent” himself but dimly understood what all the trouble was about may easily be imagined. but there can, at any rate, be no manner of doubt that the doctor of divinity enjoyed himself very much on this occasion: thundering forth denunciations barbed with quotations from musty theological works and fortified 233by apposite texts, which he must most laboriously have raked together; for those were the days before cruden’s and other concordances to the scriptures had come into being. i will be more merciful to my readers than was kellet to his congregation, and pretermit the most part of his sententious phrases and his excerpts from the patriarchs. but let the following stand as a taste of his quality.

“you,” said he, pointing a scornful finger at the baggy-breeched penitent standing there, “you whom god suffered to fall, and yet of his infinite mercy vouchsafed graciously to bring home, not only to your country and kindred, but to the profession of your first faith and to the church of sacraments again; let me say to you (but in a better hour) as sometime joshua to achan: ‘give glory to god, sing praises to him who hath delivered your soul from the nethermost hell.’ when i think upon your turkish attire, that embleme of apostacy and witness of your wofull fall, i do remember adam and his figge-leave breeches; they could neither conceal his shame, nor cover his nakedness. i do think vpon david clad in saul’s armour and his helmet of brasse. ‘i cannot goe with these,’ saith david. how could you hope in this unsanctified habit to attain heaven? how could you clad in this vnchristian weede; how could you, but with horror and astonishment thinke on the white robe of the innocent martyrs which you had lost? how could you goe in these rewards of iniquity 234and guerdons of apostacie? and with what face could you behold your selfe and others? i know you were young. so was daniel and the three children: so were dioscurus the confessor, and ponticus, the martyr: adde (if you please) english mekins, who all at fifteen yeares of age enured manfully whatsoever the furie of the persecutors pleased to inflict vpon them.”

the preacher then proceeded to remark:

“we are bound without failing to resist unto the death. you who go down to the sea in ships, and occupy your business in great waters, are reckoned by pittacus as neither amongst the dead nor the living. the grave is always open before your face, and only the thickness of an inch exists between you and eternity.”

altogether, the lot of the seafaring community was revealed to this minehead congregation in an entirely new light. they had never heard of pittacus before, and had really, you know, fancied themselves alive, and not in the dreadful tertium quid pictured by that classical philosopher.

time was also when minehead possessed a ghost, but that was long ago. it is now going on for nearly three hundred years since this malignant spectre was finally discredited, and the up-to-date circumstances of the place scarce admit the possibility of a successor. sir walter scott, in his notes to “rokeby,” tells us about this apparition, which was (or was reputed to be) that of a mrs. leakey, an amiable old widow lady of the 235little seaport, who died in 1634. she had an only son, a shipowner and seafaring man of the place, who drove a considerable trade with waterford and other ports of the south of ireland. she was in life of such a cheery and friendly disposition, and so acceptable a companion to her friends that they were accustomed to say to her and to each other what a pity it was so amiable and good-natured a woman must, in the usual course nature, be at last lost to an admiring circle in particular, and in general to a world in which her like was seldom met. to these flattering remarks she used to reply that, whatever pleasure they might now find in her company, they would not greatly like to see her, and to converse with her, after death.

after her inevitable demise, she began to appear to various persons, both by day and night: sometimes in her house and at others in the fields and lanes. she even haunted the sea. the cause of this postmortem restlessness appears to have been a small matter of a necklace which had fallen into hands she had not intended; and her dissatisfaction with this state of affairs entirely changed her once suave disposition. one of her favourite ghostly fancies was to appear upon the quay and call for a boat, much to the terror of the waterside folk. her son, however, was the principal mark of her vengeance, for her chief delight was to whistle up a wind whenever the unfortunate son’s ships drew near to port. he suffered, in consequence, so greatly from 236shipwreck that he soon became a ruined man. so apparently credible a person as the curate of minehead saw the spook, and believed, as also did her daughter-in-law, a servant, and numerous others. in fact, minehead in general placed entire confidence in the supernatural nature of “the whistling ghost”; and it was not altogether reassured by the finding of a commission that sat to enquire upon the matter, presided over by the bishop of bath and wells. the finding was “wee are yet of opinion and doe believe that there never was any such apparition at all, but that it is an imposture, devise, and fraud for some particular ends, but what they are wee know not.”

quirke’s almshouses.

there are still some quaint objects, and odd 237nooks and corners in minehead. among these an alabaster statue of queen anne (deceased some time since) is prominent in the principal street: but the local experts in the art of how not to do anything properly have just enshrined it in a clumsy stone alcove affair that not only serves the intended office of shielding the statue from the weather, but also most efficiently obscures it. this figure was the work of bird, author of the original statue of queen anne in front of st. paul’s cathedral, and was presented by sir jacob banks to the town in 1719, as some sort of recognition of the honour he had for sixteen years enjoyed of representing minehead in nine successive parliaments, by favour of the powerful local luttrell interest, he having in 1696 married the widow of colonel francis luttrell. the statue was originally placed in the church, and the churchwardens’ accounts tell us, in this wise, how it was received:

s. d.

ringing when the queen’s effigies was brought to the church 7 6

paid for beer for the men that brought in the queen’s effigies into the church 2 6

the quirke almshouses, in market house lane, form a pretty nook. their origin is sufficiently told on the little engraved brass plate that is fixed over the central door:

robert qvirck, sonne of james qvirck

bvilt this howse ano: 1630 and

doth give it to the vse of the poore

238of this parish for ever and for better

maintenance i doe give my two

inner sellers at the inner end of the key

and cvrssed bee that man that shall

convert it to any other vse then to

the vse of the poore 1630.

doorway of the manor office.

then follow the representation of a three-masted, full-rigged ship of the period, and the concluding lines:

god’s providence

is my inheritance

r q

e

minehead church.

239the shaft of an ancient cross stands at one end of this row of cottages.

the manor office, minehead.

in midst of minehead, now overshadowed by tall business premises, painfully like those to be seen any day in london, stands a charming old building, long past used as the manor office. the original use of the building, which appears to be of the fifteenth century, is unknown, and perhaps hardly even to be guessed at. the walls, of red sandstone, are immensely thick and stoutly buttressed, with oak-framed windows of semi-ecclesiastical design, still displaying traces of rich carving.

240old customs survive at minehead, in a half-hearted way, and not perhaps from any natural spontaneous joyousness, but because there is something to be made out of them. this does not, however, apply to the burning of the ashen faggot on the domestic hearth on christmas eve, and but partially to the “worslers”—i.e. “wassailers”—who every january 17th visit neighbouring orchards, and with song and dance invoke a good crop of apples in the forthcoming season. but weddings at the old parish church still form an excuse for levying tribute, and those who have attended generally discover their return barred until they have rendered the wherewithal for drinks round.

chief among the town celebrations is that of the hobby horse, surviving from a remote antiquity. it takes place annually, on the first three days of may, and assumes the shape of a gaudily caparisoned what-is-it, escorted by fishermen and fisher-lads, playing on drum and concertina, with an obbligato of money-box rattling. we have styled the hobby horse as above for the sufficient reason that it is not only utterly unlike anything equine, but with an equal conclusiveness unlike anything else on earth; being just a draped framework, hung with gaily coloured ribbons, from the midst of which rises a something intended for a capped head. the human mechanism that actuates this affair may be guessed at from the great boots that ever and again are to be seen protruding from it.

241

rood-loft turret, minehead.

this is a survival of more simple times, and seems a little out of the picture in the sophisticated streets of modern minehead. rural customs, outside the radius of the town, wear a more natural appearance.

the ancient church of minehead, the parish church of st. michael, stands as do most churches 242dedicated to that saint, on a hilly site. it is in upper town, half way up north hill, and quite remote, thanks be, from the recent developments down below. here the ancient white-faced cottages remain, and the steep steps that form the road, and here you feel that you are come again into the somerset of pre-railway times. the church is chiefly of the perpendicular period. on the tower, rather too high for their details to be easily made out without the aid of glasses, are sculptured panels representing st. michael weighing souls, with the virgin mary on one side and the devil on the other contending for possession, by pressing down the beam of the scales; and a group of god the father, holding a crucified christ. a rich projecting bay filled with windows forms an unusual feature of the south side of the church. it is the staircase turret of the rood screen, and was designed in this fashion and filled with windows, it is said, for the purpose of showing a light at night-time for fishermen making the harbour. no beacon is shown now, but it is stated that fishermen still speak of “picking up the church lights” as they make their way home. at the same time, it is only right to say that, from personal observation, it seems impossible that the windows or the turret could ever have been visible from the sea. they look out rather in a landward direction, if anything, towards dunster. but on the opposite side of the church there remains an inscription in old english characters, somewhat decayed, by which 243it is evident that the well-being of the neighbourhood was near the hearts of these church folk:

we . prey . to . john . and m(ary)

send . our . neyburs . safte.

the clock jack, minehead church.

the interior of the church is very fine, with the usual rich rood-screen we come to expect in these parts. it is possible to ascend the staircase-turret and walk along the site of the rood-loft, which was indeed until 1886, when the church was restored, occupied during service by school-children. here is preserved a queer little clock-jack figure, removed from the tower. the entrance to the chapel of st. lawrence from the chancel is by an archway curiously framed in wood, instead of stone. various relics, in the shape of old books and bibles, a carved-oak late fifteenth-century chest, and some brasses of the quirke family (among whom one notices the oddly named “izott,” wife of john quirke, mariner, 1724) reward the visitor.

this way, uphill, past the old church, is the pleasantest exit from minehead, on the way to porlock, but it is by no means the usual or the 244easiest one, as the stranger will perceive when he is reduced to enquiring the proper choice among several roads that presently confront him.

lynch chapel.

“y’ant coom up yur to get to parlock?” asked an old rustic cottage woman of the present writer, with some astonishment. being reassured that one really knew this to be a very indirect route, she abandoned the sarcasm she was prepared with, and was reduced to satire on visitors in general. “some on ’em doan’ niver think of asking the way. they jest goos arn, an’ then they goos wrong. i often larfs in me sleeve at ’em, i do.”

saucy puss!

yes. i suspect the simple countryfolk enjoy many a sly laugh at visitors, quite unsuspected.

to selworthy, over north hill, is a rugged way, of narrow woodland lanes. selworthy, as its name sufficiently indicates, is a village amid 245the woods; woods around it, above and below; the woodlands belonging to the aclands of holnicote—i.e. “hollen-cot,” or holly-cot,—that seat lying down beside the main road to porlock. here are ancient oaks and other trees, and more recent plantations that have now matured and clothed the hillsides with fir and larch. these were planted by that sir thomas acland who died, aged 89, in 1898. a wild region is that of selworthy beacon, rising to a height of 933 feet, above the village.

packhorse bridge, allerford.

the village itself is a small and scattered one, with a large and handsome church, neighboured by a monastic tithe-barn. a “peter’s pence” chest, hinting, by its size and iron bands and triple locks, great expectations, is one of the objects of interest here. but tourists from minehead and porlock do not come chiefly to see the church, beautifully restored with the aid of acland gold though it be. it is rather the fame of the pretty thatched cottages bordering a village green that 246attracts them. these owe their origin to the late sir thomas dyke acland, who built them as homes for servants grown old in his employ, and pensioned off by him.

the road down from selworthy to porlock passes the little river horner and commands views on the left hand up to the purple hills of exmoor, up to cloutsham, where the wild red deer couch, and the great heights of dunkery, easter hill, and robinow. to the left lies the hamlet of horner, so-called from the river, “hwrnr,” = “the snorer,” snoring, as the anglo-saxons are supposed to have fancifully likened the sound of its hoarse purring, over the boulders and amid the gravel-stones that strew its shallow woodland course. here, amid the woods, you may find, not far from a comparatively modern road-bridge, an ancient packhorse bridge flung steeply across the stream. at allerford is another packhorse bridge.