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Thieves' Wit

Chapter 19
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report of j. m. #9

june 25th.

to-day as i came out of the work-people's entrance to dunsany's at noon jumbo passed by on the sidewalk. he tipped me a scarcely perceptible wink, and kept on, as i was with my fellow-workmen. i suppose that he wished to catch me in the act, so to speak. in other words he wants to have it understood between us that he knows i work there. it is a step towards more confidential communications.

we met as usual to-night at the turtle bay café, but something had happened in the meantime, because jumbo was glum and sour. i made believe not to notice it. after he had a drink or two he volunteered the reason.

"a fellow broke into my rooms to-day, a sneak thief," he said.

"no! what did you do to him?" said i.

"oh, i half killed him and let him go. he didn't get anything."

this was obviously no explanation of his worried air. i continued to question him about the affair with a friend's natural curiosity, but he suddenly became suspicious, so i let it drop. i do not know if this has anything to do with your other activities, but i give it for what it's worth.

later in the evening when jumbo's good-humour was somewhat restored, he referred to our noon meeting in a facetious way.

"thought you said you were out of a job," he said.

i made believe to be somewhat confused. "ahh, i wasn't going to tell everything i knew to a stranger," i said.

he made haste to commend me. he affected a certain admiration of my astuteness. "you're a deep one, english! i bet you could teach me a trick or two!"

have i mentioned that "english" is becoming my monaker?

by this time it is thoroughly understood between jumbo and i that we are both "good sports," i.e., dependably crooked. it saves a lot of bluffing on both sides.

jumbo asked me what my job was at dunsany's. i explained how i handled all the stuff that was sent in to be reset, my particular job being to remove the jewels from their old settings before handing them on to the expert craftsmen.

"what a chance!" said jumbo wistfully. "but i suppose they have you watched."

"oh, yes," i said, and i went on to explain all the precautions against theft and loss, "but, of course——" here i made believe to be overtaken by caution.

jumbo's little eyes glistened. "of course what?" he demanded.

i tried to turn the subject which only increased his eagerness. he kept after me.

"if a man knew the trick of making paste diamonds," i suggested, "and could substitute one occasionally——! of course he'd have to make them himself. it wouldn't be safe to buy them."

jumbo whistled softly. "can you make them?" he asked.

i confessed that i could.

"but wouldn't the fellows get on to you, i mean the experts you hand the jewels on to?"

as i have already told you, jumbo knows next to nothing about diamonds, so i felt safe enough in my romancing. "not likely," i said. "the paste jewels are first rate imitations at first. it's only after a while that they lose their lustre. of course if i was found out, i'd pass the buck to the fellow who gave them to me. after the new work is returned to the customer there's no danger until the work has to be cleaned or repaired."

"how could a fellow keep all the different sizes and cuttings handy in his pocket?" jumbo asked.

"in his pocket!" i said scornfully. "he'd be spotted the first day! you make the job last over night, see? weigh, measure and test the stone you want, and bring the phony stone to match it next morning."

jumbo was breathing hard in his excitement. i suppose he saw an endless vista of profits, the risk all mine. "but ain't the stones all cut different?" he asked.

"say, you want to know as much as i do," i said sarcastically.

he fawned on me. "you're dead right, 'boe. that's your private affair."

after we had another drink or two i made believe to drop my guard completely. i left out the ifs and the coulds and admitted that my game at dunsany's was as i had described it. to prove it i brought out a couple of beautiful unset diamonds, which completed the conquest of jumbo.

"it's a cinch! a cinch!" he cried. "a couple of good men could make fifty thousand a year easy and safe. fifty thousand after the commission was taken out."

"what commission?" i demanded.

"thirty-three and a third per cent to them that disposes of the stones," said jumbo evasively.

i thought it wiser not to question jumbo any farther in that direction at present.

jumbo went on enthusiastically. "you and me'll be pardners! this is our little private graft. we won't let anybody else in, see? you on the inside, me out, we were made for each other!"

the coyer i made out to be, the more friendly was jumbo.

finally, coming down to practical matters, he asked me what the stones were worth. i told him the market value.

"of course i can't get anything like near that," he said. "but i'll make the best dicker i can. i'll let you know before i close with them."

after some more persuasion i finally handed over the stones. i knew he wouldn't play me false as long as he thought there were larger gains in prospect.

we haggled for an hour over the division of the profits. i passionately refused to consider fifty-fifty, since the work and the risk were all mine. half a dozen times the budding partnership seemed about to end. we finally agreed on sixty and forty. by holding out as i did, i believe i have lulled jumbo's suspicions forever.

the compact was cemented with a drink.

we talked on about diamonds, and i saw a new idea form and grow in jumbo's little swimming eyes. studying me speculatively, he put me through a lengthy cross-examination concerning my knowledge of precious stones.

"you're one of these here experts yourself, ain't you?" he said at last.

i modestly accepted the designation.

"what did you leave england for?" he asked suddenly.

"what's past is past," i said scowling.

"sure," he said hastily. "i don't want to pry into your affairs."

he changed the subject, but i could see him still chewing over the same idea, whatever it was.

we were sitting as usual at one of the little tables down the side of the bar-room. jumbo excused himself for a few minutes. when he came back he talked about one thing and another, but it was manifestly to gain time. he glanced at the door from time to time. i wondered what was saving for me.

at about ten o'clock, a man came into the place alone, and went to the bar without, apparently, looking at us.

"why there's foxy!" cried jumbo in great surprise.

he hailed his friend, and had him join us at our table. they overdid the casual meeting a little. i began to suspect that jumbo had telephoned this man to come and join us, and i waited with no little curiosity to see what would come of it.

the newcomer was a man of jumbo's age, but looking much younger because he was slender and well built. he was one of the plainest men i have ever seen but not in the sense of being repulsive, just plain. he was a blonde with ashy, colourless hair, and features of the "hatchet" type, that is to say sharp nose, narrow, retreating forehead, with the hair beginning some distance back. "foxy" didn't seem to fit him very well, because he looked heavy-witted, stupid, but perhaps he can be sharp enough when he wants. he had a dull, verbose style of talk, and a conceited air like a third-rate actor.

jumbo informed me with a scarcely concealed leer that foxy was a "good fellow," in other words a crook like ourselves. verily, words come to strange passes!

presently we got to talking about diamonds again, and jumbo in his character of the broker, exhibited the two he had just obtained from me. he did not, however, in my hearing say where he had got them. a look at me was a sufficient hint to say nothing about our compact. presently i began to realise that foxy in his heavier way was putting me through a sharper examination than jumbo's. my opinion of hatchet-face's cleverness went up several points.

this man exhibited a considerable theoretical knowledge of diamonds as of one who might have read up on the subject. for instance he knew the characteristics, the weight and the ownership of the world-famous stones. he had, however, nothing of the eye-to-eye knowledge of the experienced jeweller.

i apparently passed his examination satisfactorily. he glanced at jumbo in a meaning way, and the latter said:

"look ahere, english, you ought to be able to make a good thing on the side by appraising diamonds."

my heart jumped at the possibilities this opened up. was i about to land the job of diamond expert to the gang? "the profession's overcrowded," i said carelessly.

"i could put you in the way of a job occasionally," said jumbo. "some fellows foxy and me knows would be glad to pay for a little advice about buying and selling stones."

i began to hope that the end of our labours might be in sight. the next question dashed me a little.

"have you ever heard of mrs. —— ——?" foxy asked.*

* he named one of the most prominent society women in new york.—b.e.

of course i had, she is one of my best customers. i shook my head.

he gave me some details of her history which would have astonished cora —— could she have heard them. "she has a fine string of sparklers," he remarked in conclusion.

"has she?" i said innocently. i had sold them to her.

"she's at newport now," said foxy casually.

"hell! what's the use of beating round the bush!" said jumbo in his hearty way. "ain't we all friends together? it's worth a nice little sum to you, english, if you can find out and report if it's the genuine stones that she wears around town up there."

"but i can't leave my job," i objected.

"sure, he can't leave his job," said jumbo at once.

"he can go up on saturday night's boat, and come back sunday, can't he?" said foxy.

the matter was so arranged. i suppose i am in for it next saturday. will you see that mrs. —— is warned in some manner?

in the meantime i am to be taken to see the "friends" that buy and sell diamonds. here's hoping that this may prove to be the grand headquarters of the gang.

when we left the place, jumbo excusing himself, pulled foxy aside, and held a brief, whispered consultation with him, which boded ill for somebody. their faces were distorted with anger. foxy took the west-bound cross-town car, and we walked over to the subway.

jumbo anxious, i suppose, to make me feel that i had not been left out of anything, said: "me and frank had a little trouble to-day. there's a bull poking his nose into our private business."

hoping to hear more, i heartily joined with him in consigning the whole race of "bulls" to perdition.

"oh, this is only an amateur-like," said jumbo. "he's running a little private graft of his own. he ain't dangerous. me and foxy's got it fixed to trim him nicely."

this was all i could get. i mention it, thinking that it may be of interest to you.

i suppose if either of my worthy friends ever suspected that i was not a "good fellow," my life would not be worth a jack-straw. the same menace lurks behind jumbo's swimming pig-eyes, and foxy's dull ones. but i am enjoying the spice of danger. the only thing that irks me are the tiresome hours at my work bench in dunsany's. i'll be glad when the game becomes livelier. this is life!

j. m.

report of a. n.

june 25th.

k. milbourne came out of his boarding-house at 9:20 to-night. walked east to seventh avenue, north on seventh to fifty-eighth street, and east to a resort near third avenue called "under the greenwood tree." this is a saloon and restaurant with a large open air garden in the rear where a band plays.

i waited outside upwards of an hour. then i went in to see if i had my man safe. i found there was a back entrance from the garden out to fifty-ninth street, and he was gone. i'm sorry, but "accidents will happen!" i returned to the boarding-house. milbourne came home at 11:35, and judging from the light in his room, went directly to bed.

a. n.

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