obtain a passport after some difficulty from prince metternich—start for england via rouen and havre—sail to spithead—amused at englishwomen’s queer dress—return to family—acquitted for loss of h.m.s. apelles.

the morning before my departure i waited on lord aberdeen, requesting a passport to england; he referred me to prince metternich. i reached his hotel, and had to wade through a host of long-whiskered, long-piped gentlemen, who were smoking with all their might and main, and spitting in all directions.

as i advanced, a genteel-looking young man, who was dressed in an aide-de-camp’s uniform, came to me and asked in french the purport of my visit. i informed him. he left me, and soon returned and requested i would walk into another room, where i found the german prince, who received me very cavalierly, and asked me what i did in paris when there were transports waiting at bordeaux to carry over the english.

“i thank your highness for the information, but i do not wish to go by that route. my intention is to return to england by havre, and i shall feel obliged by your granting me a passport to that effect.”

“you should go to lord aberdeen for one.”

[pg 333]

“i have already seen him, and he directed me to you, as you were in command of the capital,” i replied.

he muttered something which i could not, nor did i wish to, understand. after a pause he asked me my rank. i informed him, when he directed his secretary to make out my passport, and here ended much ado about nothing.

we started next morning, slept at rouen, revisited its ancient cathedral, which had been struck by lightning, breakfasted, and arrived at havre, where we remained two days, waiting for a vessel to take us across the channel. i viewed this town with much interest, as it had saluted the vessels i had belonged to with several hundred shot.

we arrived at spithead in the evening, but too late to go on shore. there were nine of us—men, women, and squalling children—and we had the comfort of lying on the cabin deck, there being no sleeping berths, as the vessel was only about fifty tons, and not fitted up for passengers.

when i landed next morning i appeared to tread on air, but i could not help laughing out aloud at the, i thought, ridiculous and anything but picturesque dresses of the women. their coal-scuttle bonnets and their long waists diverted me, although i was sorry to observe in my healthy and fair countrywomen such an ignorance of good taste. i took a hasty mutton chop at the “fountain,” and started for london by the first stage coach.

on my arrival at dear home i found all i loved in [pg 334]good health. my excellent wife and affectionate boys and girls clung round me, and i was as happy as an innocent sucking pig, or, if my reader thinks the simile not in place, as happy as a city alderman at a turtle feast.

a few days after my appearance at the admiralty i was ordered to proceed to portsmouth, to undergo my trial for the loss of the ship, which, as a son of the emerald isle would say, was no loss at all, as she was retaken afterwards.

my sentence was as honourable to the officers of the court martial as it was to myself. i received my sword from the president, admiral sir george martin, with a high encomium.

the days of my youth have floated by like a dream, and after having been forty-five years in the navy my remuneration is a hundred and eighty pounds a year, without any prospect of its being increased. if the generality of parents would take my advice they never would send one of their boys into the service without sufficient interest and some fortune. if they do, their child, if he behaves well, may die in his old age, possibly as a lieutenant, with scarcely an income to support himself; and if he should under these circumstances have the misfortune to have married and have children, god, i hope, will help him, for i very much fear no one else will!

here ends my eventful but matter-of-fact history, which, if it has afforded my reader any amusement, my pains are well repaid.