"louis, i wish you would look at baby before you go; i do not think she is well to-night."
"what is the matter now? you are always thinking she is ill: she seemed well enough this morning."
"i don't know. she is restless and uneasy; i wish you would come."
"of course i will, but i am in a great hurry just now; mrs. headley has sent for me, and old mr. growl has another attack. i must go to the people in the office now, but i will come up to baby before i start."
"had you not better see baby first? perhaps you might forget, with so many people to attend to."
"forget? not i. why, natalie, how do you think i should ever get on if i had no better memory than that?"
but he did forget, and was gone when natalie again sought him. "i thought it would be so," she sighed. baby became more and more uneasy, and moaned and fretted in her sleep. natalie knelt beside the bed, and tried to soothe her darling, thinking sadly of the long hours that would elapse before louis's return, but all her efforts were in vain. izzie did not wake or cry, but this only alarmed natalie the more. the deadly palor of her countenance was the only sign of the anguish she suffered; outwardly, she was very calm. if she could only have done anything for her pet! but to wait, and watch, not knowing what to do, this was unendurable; and she was just debating in her own mind if she ought not to send for another doctor, as louis might be detained all night, when she heard him come in. she pressed her cold hands upon her brow, and ordered sarah to bring him immediately; while she rose from her knees, and breathlessly waited for his coming.
"what's the matter with popsy?" he asked, cheerfully, as he entered the room, but his countenance became grave as his eye rested on the sick child. "what is this?," he inquired, "why was i not told before? tut, tut, what have you been thinking about, natalie," he added, as he felt the child's pulse.
"i asked you to come and see her before you went out," natalie answered, in an almost inaudible voice.
"yes, but you did not say that there was anything particularly the matter." he stooped over the child and examined her more carefully. "she is seriously ill," he said.
and the words sent a thrill of pain to natalie's aching heart.
"why do you treat me in this shameful manner?" he continued bitterly. "why let the child go on until it is almost past recovery, and then send for me in the greatest haste?--just the same way when she had the croup. i am surprised at you natalie; it is really quite childish." he ordered the bath to be brought immediately.
impatiently waving natalie aside, he took the child in his arms and put her into the bath; while natalie stood by, in speechless agony, louis refusing to allow her to assist in any way. how cruel! to have done anything for her darling would have been an unspeakable relief. as it was, she could only stand by while he murmured, in a tone which greatly distressed her "poor little popsy," "did they neglect papa's darling?" he would suffer no one to touch her but himself, and what assistance he did accept was from sarah, it being into her arms he put baby while he went for the medicine she required. poor natalie, how this grieved her; for though she took the child from sarah, the slight was the same. "oh, baby, baby!" she murmured, as the burning tears fell on little isabel's face, "what should i have left if you were taken from me?"
when louis returned, he took the child, administered the medicine, and was about to lay her in the bed.
"let me take her," whispered natalie, in a tone of tremulous earnestness and passionate entreaty.
"no, she is better here," he replied.
"oh, please, louis!" she pleaded, but he was firm.
she stood, with clasped hands, silently gazing on the babe with a strange sensation of awe and dread, and a yearning wish to do something for her.
"you are not required, natalie," louis said, "you had better go to bed." with a gulp she restrained the rising sob, and stooped to kiss her darling. "you will only disturb her," he said, putting out his arm to prevent her doing so. then natalie could only steal away to her dressing-room, and there, alone in the darkness, she crept to the sofa and hid her face in the cushion, to hush the tumultuous sobs, while she breathed fervent prayers for baby's recovery. but a horrible dread surrounded her: she could not endure to be absent from her pet, and noiselessly she stole back to the nursery. she was glad that louis did not observe her entrance, and retreated to the dimmest corner of the room, and there, in the old arm-chair, listened to baby's uneasy breathing, which caused her an agony of grief and pain. yet she could do nothing but sit and suffer--suffer, oh, how deeply! thus the night wore away, and louis was not aware of her presence until, as the day dawned, he beheld the wan, wretched face of his poor little wife. going to her side, he said, "this is wrong, natalie; go and rest." she shook her head. "you must, indeed: you know i have to leave her to you the greater part of the day, and this is no preparation for the watchful care she will need."
"she cannot need more care than i will gladly give," returned natalie, with trembling lip. her face wore an expression, so sad--so suffering--that louis must, indeed, have been adamant if he had not been softened. stroking her hair caressingly, he was about to lead her from the room with gentle force, when, grasping his hand convulsively, she said, in an almost inaudible voice, "i cannot, cannot go; have pity, louis," she added, raising her tearful eyes to his.
"for an hour or two, and then you shall take care of baby."
"if--if--you would let me kiss her, i will lie down here, but i cannot leave her," she answered, almost choking.
"you may do that," he said, with a disagreeable sense of the fact that he had been unkind, to use no harsher term. and he lifted a weight from natalie's heart, as he placed a shawl over her, saying, "try to sleep, dear; you know how much depends upon you," in sweet, modulated tones of thrilling tenderness, such as louis knew well how to use--none better, when it suited him to do so.
it mattered not to little izzie who tended her for many days; not so, however, when she began to mend, for now she would suffer none but mamma to touch her. she would scarcely bear to be put out of her arms. if natalie attempted to lay her in the cradle, thinking she slept, instantly the tiny arms would be clasped round mamma's neck, and she would take her up again. no more could papa usurp mamma's rights; no coaxing or persuasion would induce her to allow him to take her. only from mamma's hand would she take her medicine. on more than one occasion natalie had to be aroused from the little sleep she allowed herself, to administer it. all this annoyed louis beyond measure, but he did not again give way to his temper before the child, except on one occasion. he had, in the strongest terms, urged upon natalie the importance of giving the medicine with regularity. the bottle was empty, and natalie sent it down to be filled, but by some means it got mixed with the other medicines to be sent out, and was not returned to her. she suffered tortures for the want of it during his absence. when he returned, coming straight to baby as usual, he learned how it was, and found her worse for want of it, his indignation was extreme, and he heaped upon natalie unjust and unmerited reproach, in harsh and bitter terms. his cruel words cut her to the heart, but her only answer was a gentle request that he would get it at once. truly isabel had not much to regret.