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The Old Room

CHAPTER XIX
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hans and finn were driving in the woods, when a little stray dog ran under the wheel and was badly hurt.

they both jumped out of the carriage. hans knelt on the ground and took the gasping dog in his arms:

“give me your pocket-handkerchief,” he said.

not receiving it at once, he looked up, impatiently.

finn did not stir.

he stood leaning over the dog and looking into its glazed eyes with a great, deep, strange glance. he was not thinking whether it was an animal or a human being, whether it could be saved or whether he himself could do anything....

[235]“finn!”

he did not stir. he was staring into the great face of death. the door of the dark house was flung open and he stared and stared into the darkness. his soul was filled with a devout awe. he felt nothing, saw nothing, but life expiring before his eyes.

hans looked at him speechlessly, terrified at the expression in his face, which he did not know how to interpret, and grew more and more agitated.

“give me your pocket-handkerchief, finn.”

finn started. he looked up and handed him the handkerchief:

“i didn’t think of it,” he said.

hans did not reply. in a little while, the dog was dead and he flung it in among the trees in such a way that finn could have struck him.

they got into the carriage and drove on[236] in silence. finn thought of nothing but what he had seen and did not suspect his friend’s agitation. then, suddenly, he told the coachman to pull up:

“you mustn’t mind, hans,” he said. “i am going to get out.... i can go home by myself.... i want to be alone for a little.”

hans jumped out of the carriage and walked away without saying good-bye. finn took no notice. he let the coachman shut the door, shrank into a corner and drove home.

fru adelheid came to him in the old room and could not make him speak of what lay on his mind. she smiled to him and took his hand and sang for him.

but finn sat silent and absent.

some time after, the friends were walking, one evening, through the streets and[237] along the canal, where the boats lay in a row and, on the other side, an old castle stood, with broken windows and charming green roofs.

“let us sit here for a bit,” said finn.

they sat on the quay. the water flowed black and angry beneath them. the boats rocked and bumped and swayed. hans drummed with his cane against the embankment-wall:

“is it like this in venice?” he asked.

“no,” said finn. “it’s finer there. because one’s strange to it.”

hans laughed gaily and finn said nothing more and looked down into the water.

then they suddenly heard a shout.

they both sprang up and ran and, when they had come some distance, they saw a child on the point of drowning:

“here, finn ... help me....”

[238]hans scrambled down into one of the boats and was fumbling with the oars. but finn ran on and jumped into the water, where the child was, without a moment’s reflection.

he could not swim and hans had first to save him. then, with the greatest difficulty, he rescued the child. they went home to cordt’s house and, when the first fright was over and it became clear that finn had suffered no harm, they all sat in the living-room and talked about it.

fru adelheid held finn’s hand between her own and patted it and pressed it. cordt walked up and down in great emotion.

“how could you take it into your head?” said hans. “you know you can’t swim.”

“i never gave it a thought,” said finn, quietly.

[239]cordt stopped in front of his son and nodded to him. fru adelheid kissed him on the forehead and her eyes beamed.

hans looked at them, crimson with anger.

he thought of how finn might have been drowned, or the child, or both of them. then he remembered the scene in the woods, with the dying dog. he could not understand these people’s train of thought and he despised it. he looked at none of them and, with an effort, forced his voice to be calm, as he said:

“one has no right to behave like that. it is stupid.”

“yes,” said finn.

but cordt put his hand on the engineer’s shoulder and looked at him in such a way that hans suddenly remembered his own little faint-hearted father:

[240]“yes,” said cordt, “it is stupid that finn shouldn’t know how to swim.”

then it was decided that cordt’s son should learn to swim.

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