'i haven't been out of this bed in twenty years and i'm notgetting out now for anybody!' said grandma josephine firmly.

'nor me,' said grandma georgina.

'you were out of it just now, every one of you,' said mrwonka.

'that was floating,' said grandpa george. 'we couldn't help it.'

'we never put our feet on the floor,' said grandma josephine.

'try it,' said mr wonka. 'you might surprise yourself'go on, josie,' said grandpa joe. 'give it a try. i did. it waseasy.'

'we're perfectly comfortable where we are, thank you verymuch,' said grandma josephine.

mr wonka sighed and shook his head very slowly and verysadly. 'oh well,' he said, 'so that's that.' he laid his head onone side and gazed thoughtfully at the three old people in thebed, and charlie, watching him closely, saw those bright littleeyes of his beginning to spark and twinkle once again.

ha-ha, thought charlie. what's coming now?

'i suppose,' said mr wonka, placing the tip of one finger onthe point of his nose and pressing gently, 'i suppose …because this is a very special case … i suppose i could spareyou just a tiny little bit of …' he stopped and shook his head.

'a tiny little bit of what?' said grandma josephine sharply.

'no,' said mr wonka. 'it's pointless. you seem to have decidedto stay in that bed whatever happens. and anyway, the stuff ismuch too precious to waste. i'm sorry i mentioned it.' hestarted to walk away.

'hey!' shouted grandma georgina. 'you can't begin somethingand not go on with it! what is too precious to waste?'

mr wonka stopped. slowly he turned around. he looked longand hard at the three old people in the bed. they looked backat him, waiting. he kept silent a little longer, allowing theircuriosity to grow. the oompa-loompas stood absolutely stillbehind him, watching.

'what is this thing you're talking about?' said grandmageorgina. 'get on with it, for heaven's sake!' said grandmajosephine.

'very well,' mr wonka said at last. 'i'll tell you. and listencarefully because this could change your whole lives. it couldeven change you.'

'i don't want to be changed!' shouted grandma georgina.

'may i go on, madam? thank you. not long ago, i was foolingabout in my inventing room, stirring stuff around and mixingthings up the way i do every afternoon at four o'clock, whensuddenly i found i had made something that seemed veryunusual. this thing i had made kept changing colour as ilooked at it, and now and again it gave a little jump, it actuallyjumped up in the air, as though it were alive. "what have wehere?" i cried, and i rushed it quickly to the testing roomand gave some to the oompa-loompa who was on duty thereat the time. the result was immediate! it was flabbergasting! itwas unbelievable! it was also rather unfortunate.'

'what happened?' said grandma georgina, sitting up.

'what indeed,' said mr wonka.

'answer her question,' said grandma josephine. 'whathappened to the oompa-loompa?'

'ah,' said mr wonka, 'yes … well … there's no point in cryingover spilled milk, is there? i realized, you see, that i hadstumbled upon a new and tremendously powerful vitamin, andi also knew that if only i could make it safe, if only i couldstop it doing to others what it did to that oompa-loompa …'

'what did it do to that oompa-loompa?' said grandmageorgina sternly.

'the older i get, the deafer i become,' said mr wonka. 'doplease raise your voice a trifle next time. thank you so much.

now then. i simply had to find a way of making this stuffsafe, so that people could take it without … er …'

'without what?' snapped grandma georgina.

'without a leg to stand on,' said mr wonka. 'so i rolled upmy sleeves and set to work once more in the inventing room.

i mixed and i mixed. i must have tried just about everymixture under the moon. by the way, there is a little hole inone wall of the inventing room which connects directly withthe testing room next door, so i was able all the time tokeep passing stuff through for testing to whichever bravevolunteer happened to be on duty. well, the first few weekswere pretty depressing and we won't talk about them. let metell you instead what happened on the one hundred andthirty-second day of my labours. that morning, i had changedthe mixture drastically, and this time the little pill i produced atthe end of it all was not nearly so active or alive as the othershad been. it kept changing colour, yes, but only fromlemon-yellow to blue, then back to yellow again. and when iplaced it on the palm of my hand, it didn't jump about like agrasshopper. it only quivered, and then ever so slightly.

'i ran to the hole in the wall that led to the testing room. avery old oompa-loompa was on duty there that morning. hewas a bald, wrinkled, toothless old fellow. he was in awheel-chair. he had been in the wheel-chair for at least fifteenyears.

'"this is test number one hundred and thirty-two!" i said,chalking it up on the board.

'i handed him the pill. he looked at it nervously. i couldn'tblame him for being a bit jittery after what had happened tothe other one hundred and thirty-one volunteers.'

'what had happened to them?' shouted grandma georgina.

'why don't you answer the question instead of skidding aroundit on two wheels?'

'who knows the way out of a rose?' said mr wonka. 'so thisbrave old oompa-loompa took the pill and, with the help of alittle water, he gulped it down. and then, suddenly, the mostamazing thing happened. before my very eyes, queer littlechanges began taking place in the way he looked. a momentearlier, he had been practically bald, with just a fringe ofsnowy white hair around the sides and the back of his head.

but now the fringe of white hair was turning gold and all overthe top of his head new gold hair was beginning to sprout, likegrass. in less than half a minute, he had grown a splendidnew crop of long golden hair. at the same time, many of thewrinkles started disappearing from his face, not all of them, butabout half, enough to make him look a good deal younger,and all of this must have given him a nice tickly feelingbecause he started grinning at me, then laughing, and as soonas he opened his mouth, i saw the strangest sight of all. teethwere growing up out from those old toothless gums, goodwhite teeth, and they were coming up so fast i could actuallysee them getting bigger and bigger.

'i was too flabbergasted to speak. i just stood there with myhead poking through the hole in the wall, staring at the littleoompa-loompa. i saw him slowly lifting himself out of hiswheel-chair. he tested his legs on the ground. he stood up.

he walked a few paces. then he looked up at me and hisface was bright. his eyes were huge and bright as two stars.

'"look at me," he said softly. "i'm walking! it's a miracle!"'"it's wonka-vite!" i said. "the great rejuvenator. it makes youyoung again. how old do you feel now?"

'he thought carefully about this question, then he said, "i feelalmost exactly how i felt when i was fifty years old."'"how old were you just now, before you took thewonka-vite?" i asked him.

'"seventy last birthday," he answered.

"that means," i said, "it has made you twenty years younger."'"it has, it has!" he cried, delighted. "i feel as frisky as afroghopper!"

'"not frisky enough," i told him. "fifty is still pretty old. let ussee if i can't help you a bit more. stay right where you are.

i'll be back in a twink."

'i ran to my work-bench and began to make one more pill ofwonka-vite, using exactly the same mixture as before.

'"swallow this," i said, passing the second pill through thehatch. there was no hesitating this time. eagerly, he popped itinto his mouth and chased it down with a drink of water. andbehold, within half a minute, another twenty years had fallenaway from his face and body and he was now a slim andsprightly young oompa-loompa of thirty. he gave a whoop ofjoy and started dancing around the room, leaping high in theair and coming down on his toes. "are you happy?" i askedhim.

'"i'm ecstatic!" he cried, jumping up and down. "i'm happy asa horse in a hay-field!" he ran out of the testing room toshow himself off to his family and friends.

'thus was wonka-vite invented!' said mr wonka. 'and thuswas it made safe for all to use!'

'why don't you use it yourself, then?' said grandma georgina.

'you told charlie you were getting too old to run the factory,so why don't you just take a couple of pills and get fortyyears younger? tell me that?'

'anyone can ask questions,' said mr wonka. 'it's the answersthat count. now then, if the three of you in the bed wouldcare to try a dose …'

'just one minute!' said grandma josephine, sitting up straight.

'first i'd like to take a look at this seventy-year-oldoompa-loompa who is now back to thirty!'

mr wonka flicked his fingers. a tiny oompa-loompa, lookingyoung and perky, ran forward out of the crowd and did amarvellous little dance in front of the three old people in thebig bed. 'two weeks ago, he was seventy years old and in awheel-chair!' mr wonka said proudly. 'and look at him now!'

'the drums, charlie!' said grandpa joe. 'listen! they're startingup again!'

far away down on the bank of the chocolate river, charliecould see the oompa-loompa band striking up once more.

there were twenty oompa-loompas in the band, each with anenormous drum twice as tall as himself, and they were beatinga slow mysterious rhythm that soon had all the otherhundreds of oompa-loompas swinging and swaying from sideto side in a kind of trance. they then began to chant:

'if you are old and have the shakes,

if all your bones are full

of aches,

if you can hardly walk at all,if living drives you upthe wall,if you're a grump and full of spite,if you're a humanparasite,then what you need is wonka-vite!youreyes will shine, your hair will grow,your face and skin willstart to glow,

your rotten teeth will all drop out

and in their

place new teeth will sprout.those rolls of fat around your hipswill vanish, and your wrinkled lipswill get so soft androsy-pinkthat all the boys will smile and winkand whispersecretly that thisis just the girl they want to kiss!but wait! forthat is not the mostimportant thing of which to boast.goodlooks you'll have, we've told you so,

but looks aren't everything,

you know.

each pill, as well, to you will give

an extra

twenty years to live!

so come, old friends, and do

what's right!let's make your lives as bright as bright!let's takea dose of this delight!

this heavenly magic dynamite!you can't

go wrong, you must go right!

it's willy wonka's

wonka-vite!'